Sunday, August 14, 2016

Wingnut Wrapup

And let's start out with a report on the most hard working men in politics:

Katie Pavlich, Town Hall:  "House Task Force Confirms: ISIS Threat Was Altered in Intelligence Reports For Political Purposes"

A House "task force."  A house task force composed entirely of Republicans.  Just like the Benghazi guys.

"A roughly 10-page report on the controversy is expected to be released by the end of next week, two officials said."

TEN PAGES!  Man, that will be some report.  Even Katie is forced to admit:

 "While it contains no definitive evidence that senior Obama administration officials ordered the reports to be doctored..."

Oh hell, why go on?  Meanwhile their candidate for President is threatening the life of ours, but hey, that's just fine.  Katie concludes:

"The Obama administration has been putting politics above national security for years. It's no wonder America and the world have become increasingly less safe."

Listen, you pathetic tool, if the Obama administration has done that, why not report on it, instead of running a misleading report on something that didn't happen?

Matt Vespa, Town Hall:  "Survey: 86 Percent Of America's Mayors 'Very Worried' About Police Officer Safety"

Republicans once again congratulating themselves on the success of their endless deception.  The majority of police officers never use their guns in the entire course of their careers, and killings of police officers peaked in the Reagan administration, and have declined strongly during Obama's time in office.

Katie Pavlich, Town Hall:  "Trump Was Referring to Second Amendment Voters, Not Assassination"

Grow up, you little liar, and stop being a traitor.  He was referring to killing a sitting American President, and referring to it as if it were a pretty good idea.  And he's your guy, Miss Katie Patriot. Listen, Katy, if you want to make a living being dishonest, why not just become a prostitute? That way, you will only be infecting people one at a time.

Thomas Sowell, Town Hall:  "A year ago, in August 2015, this column called "The Donald" the Democrats' Trump card. It is hard to imagine any other Republican candidate who could rescue a thoroughly discredited Hillary Clinton from a devastating defeat in this year's election."

Hey, you guys picked him, not us.  And do you think Ted Cruz would be doing much better?

"The strongest argument -- indeed, the only argument -- for voting for Trump is Hillary Clinton."

They'd be saying the same thing if the Democrats had nominated Jesus.  Can't you see Thomas saying that you need to vote for Trump, or Jesus will get into office and raise your taxes?

"How did we get into the predicament where our choices for President are narrowed to a candidate who inspires distrust versus a candidate who inspires disgust..."

And the answer?

"One key misstep by the Republican establishment was agreeing, once again, to so-called "debates"

Better to have stuck with TV spots funded by the Koch brothers.  You can tell all the lies you want there, without having any pesky Democrats say anything about them.

Guy Benson, Town Hall:  "Trump's 'Second Amendment' Comment: Inappropriate and Dumb, But a Joke"

I don't know about you, but it didn't make me laugh, and I thought that was pretty much the definition of a joke, unless you are talking about when "the joke's on you."

Ed Klein, Town Hall:  "The FBI Always Gets Its Man (or Woman) and May Still Get Hillary"

For being "careless."  On those grounds, Green Eagle might have gotten the death penalty when a parakeet he bought escaped.

“Hillary shouldn’t imagine that she’s free and clear. Comey may have pulled his punches the last time around because he didn’t think his case was winnable in a court of law, but it’s possible that new evidence could shock the country and make Hillary a very vulnerable presidential candidate.”

It's possible that new evidence will prove that Hillary is from Mars, I guess.  Meanwhile, not a word about whether it is "careless" to suborn the murder of a President of the United States.

Guy Benson, Town Hall:  "Uh Oh: Clinton 50, Trump 37"

You know what?  It's a sign of how sick this country is that Trump would even be polling 7.

Streiff, Red State:  "Democrat Ted Strickland Jokes That Justice Antonin Scalia “Died At A Good Time”

I just want to state that Ted Strickland was very wrong to have said this.  A "good time" for Antonin Scalia to have died would have been the day after he was nominated.

Evilbloggerlady, Red State:  " The media spent five times more airtime on Trump's 2nd amendment comments than Hillary Clinton inviting the Orlando shooter's dad to premium seats for her Florida rally."

Actually, it is a disgrace that they didn't spend a thousand times more airtime on Trump's threatened assassination of Hillary, which actually happened, as on Hillary's inviting some guy to her Florida rally, which didn't.  See the difference there?

Bob Bennet, Red State:  "Did Obama’s FBI Want Us All Dead?"

No.  If we were all dead, how could they force us to convert to Islam?

Paula Boyard, PJ Media:  "[Live Video] There's a Guy Climbing Trump Tower Right Now...How high will he go?"

Higher than Donald's poll numbers, I'll bet, unless he's climbing down into the underground parking garage.

Stephen Kruiser, PJ Media:  "Report: Fiorina Angling for Reince Priebus' Job...She can't be any worse at it."

I don't see how she could be any better at it either, given that it involves turning Donald Trump into a decent human being. Maybe they should give Dr. Phil a shot at it.  Well, the inevitable Republican search for scapegoats is under way.

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit:  "ANOTHER MASSIVE RALLY=> 12,000 Line Up to See Trump in Sunrise,FL"

People love to watch a disaster, Jim.

Helen Raleigh, Town Hall:  "Local Efforts in Battleground States May Determine the Outcome of 2016"

They're getting desperate now for a shred of hope.  "Local efforts" are going to win the day.  As if Trump has any, except for maybe having storm troopers shoot anyone who tries to vote for Hillary.

Kevin Glass, Town Hall:  "The Obama Administration's Student Loan Proposal Could Decimate Small Colleges"

By giving them more students.  This just in:  "The Obama Administration's Student Loan Proposal Could Drive Porcupines Into Extinction!"  I mean, it could.

Justin Holcomb, Town Hall:  "Photos: Hillary Builds a Wall... Around Her House"

Nothing to do with the fact that her opponent in the Presidential contest has called for her to be assassinated, does it?

Cortney O'Brien, Town Hall:  "While it didn't seem likely Trump actually thought Obama created (ISIS), he has made yet another verbal flip flop and is again having to clarify a comment - meaning more negative optics."

"Negative optics..."  A new Republican synonym for "lies."

Matt Vespa, Town Hall:  "Was A DNC Staffer Murdered In A Politically Motivated Hit? Wikileaks Founder Won’t Confirm Or Deny"

Which the Wikileaks founder would know everything about, seeing as he lives in an embassy in London, and knows only what any of us could find on the internet.  Still, why not suggest that serial killer Hillary has killed again?

Cortney O'Brien, Town Hall:  "Tapper: Yes, Hillary's Integrity Deserves to Be Questioned After Clinton Foundation Emails"

There!  She did it!  She found a new way to get the words "Hillary" and "e-mails" into the same sentence!

And now, a lesson in how you reach conclusions, Republican style, from Red State:

Leon H. Wolf, Red State:  "Don’t Look Now, but Donald Trump Has Had a Pretty Good Day of Polling"

Susan Wright, Red State:  "Hillary up Four Points Over Trump in Georgia? Not So Fast…"

See? If we just ignore what the polls actually say, things look great for Trump.  Keep up that thinking, guys- it's a Republican tradition, after all.

Stephen Stone, Renew America:  "Will Obama be impeached now that Republicans control both houses of Congress? (Nov. 2014)"

Why Renew America chose to repost this, I will never know, since it reveals them to be idiots.  Still, I guess you can't blame them for pining for better times.

Frank Lewis, Renew America:  "People in the media make a big deal about Donald Trump's businesses filling bankruptcy. It is the law, he followed it. He filed bankruptcy for the same reasons any other business or individual does."

Yeah, because he is a loser.  A LOSER, Donald.  A loser with little hands!  Loser, loser loser!!!!!

"While I am not an expert on this, I believe his business bankruptcies were a result of the bad economy. The worst economy "since the depression" is how I heard it."

Well, the way I heard it is that Trump declared bankruptcy six times: in 1991, in 1992, again in 1992, again in 1992, in 2004, and in 2009.  If that was "the worst economy since the depression," it sure lasted a hell of a long time, so  why didn't every other businessman declare bankruptcy six times? Just asking.  Anyway, let me end this just by repeating the following:  LOSER!

Man that felt good.  Let's do it again:  Trump is a LOSER!

Frank somehow then manages to move on to the following remark:

"So, the other question that gets posed to Obama and Hillary (among others) is if Donald Trump has the correct composure and temperament to have his hand on the nuclear button. I think so!  Our adversaries will surely use more caution if they know there is a chance that our president might push the button"

The right temperament to be President- an out of control maniac who just might decide it is time to end humanitiy's long experiment with civilization, and go back to living in caves.  Frank actually seems to be okay with that.

Susan Ferrechio, Washington Examiner:  "Third-party candidates could swing presidential election"

Keep praying, guys.  Maybe Jesus could come back soon and make the whole thing meaningless. Man, that would be one October surprise, huh?

Joseph Farah, World Net Daily:  "As one of those who has suggested Donald Trump has the potential not only to win the 2016 presidential election, but to win in a landslide, it’s time for a note of clarification."

A note of clarification: yeah, that Joseph Farah is one gigantic dumbass.  And here, I thought that was already pretty clear.

And now, let's just go out on this sad news:

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit:   "BREAKING=> TOP PHYSICIAN: Hillary Clinton Has Parkinson’s Disease"

Well, let's see now:  I've discovered by looking online for about ten minutes that she has permanent brain damage, grand mal seizures, AIDS, dementia, brain tumors and several other kinds of cancer, clinical depression, coughing, acting "extremely weird," three strokes, multiple sclerosis, alcoholism, "transverse sinus thrombosis," whatever in hell that is, and now Parkinson's disease.  And one of the articles I read went on to say that her shoes cost too much.

Well, this is one tough woman, to keep going with all of that.  I think she will make a hell of a President.  As soon as she figures out how to get a better deal on her shoes.


Zog said...

"Well, the way I heard it is that Trump declared bankruptcy six times: in 1991, in 1992, again in 1992, again in 1992, in 2004, and in 2009."

The first five times were under Republican presidencies. If Trump's bankruptcies were due to recessions, who caused the economic problems?

Magpie said...

“Our adversaries will surely use more caution if they know there is a chance that our president might push the button"

I love the faith that Right-wingers have in the rationality of fundamentalist religious loons that get a kick out of martyrdom.
I mean... brilliant...
Appeal to the capacity for rational choice found in chanting mobs of hate-filled apocalyptic psychopaths.
Why didn’t you think of that earlier, GE? – you could have got much of the Republican base onside.

Green Eagle said...

Yeah, that could be me up there, lying my ass off every day, for fun and profit. It may surprise you, but through a combination of circumstances, I was a member of the Republican State Central Committee in Michigan, before I was 20 years old. I was being groomed for a bigger role along with one other guy, who was named Robert Odle. It took me about nine months to realize what a corrupt, sickening organization the Republicans were, so I walked away from it all. Mr. Odle stuck with it, and ended up in prison in the Watergate scandal.

Magpie said...

I remember you mentioning...

Might be a good idea to state that somewhere in a blog description or something, so that visitors here realise you haven't just come out of nowhere with your view of that party.