What Right Wingers Are Learning About Federal Hurricane Ida Rescue Efforts

 Here is what you would hear if you follow right wing websites:


"Julie Davis, 27, and her three-year-old daughter Hannah, were among the residents of Tamiami Trail Lane that stayed behind...


 Of course, the stupidity of her actions caught up with her, her home was flooded and she was likely to drown.


Mrs. Davis thought salvation had arrived when, glancing outside a window, she spied a motorized raft pulling up alongside her inundated home. Shouting through a bullhorn, the persons on the raft identified themselves as agents of the Federal Emergency Management Agency and said they were taking storm survivors to secure shelters far from the flood.


She cradled Hannah in her arms and plodded down a staircase into murky water, which reached her thighs.  A FEMA agent in the raft insisted that she evacuate, and, leaning over, yanked the child from Mrs. Davis’ arms.


It was then that the agent asked Mrs. Davis whether she had valuables in the home he needed to know about—cash, gold, jewelry, or guns. When she said everything was under water, the agent told her deliverance had a price. If she couldn’t pay, she wouldn’t be saved. The FEMA agent then held Hannah by the wrist and dangled her over the edge of the raft, saying, “Are you sure you aren’t hiding anything from us?”


At that moment, by sheer luck, an airboat holding six U.S. Special Forces soldiers veered onto the street. They assessed the situation and through a bullhorn of their own commanded the FEMA agents to surrender and handoff the child to her mother. Four of the six soldiers aimed rifles at the marauding FEMA agents.


“Come any closer and we’ll drop her,” one FEMA agent shouted.


A round sizzled through his forehead, killing him instantly. He tumbled off the raft into the water.


“The rest of you are dead if you don’t comply,” a Special Forces soldier replied.


The remaining FEMA agents stood down and returned the child to her mother.


“The other 3 FEMA agents have been taken into custody, and Mrs. Davis and Hannah are now with Mr. Davis in a safe location,” our source said. “We got lucky. Right place, right time. Truly miraculous; otherwise, who knows what they would’ve done to Julie and Hannah.”


I suppose I need hardly tell you that not one word of the above malignant fantasy is true, but it will pass as accepted knowledge to all the hundreds of thousands of right wingers who see this and similar stories.  Is it any wonder that they see the federal government as evil monsters?   


Comments

Infidel753 said…
Holy crap, I've seen some bad fantasy writing, but this makes Mothra sound like a documentary by comparison. But sure, there are plenty of wingnuts who will believe it.
Mostly.A.Cynic said…
Well those FEMA agents are holdovers from Obama's FEMA camps at least that's how Fox and it's mutant stepchild's Newsmax and Oan would spin it
bt1138 said…
But for some odd reason, the guys with the guns don't count as government.

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