Wingnut Wrapup

Hey, you didn't think I was going to give up on them forever, did you? Actually, they were pretty out there today, for a Saturday, so let's just dive right into the swamp:

Jon Sanders, Town Hall: "Twelve Simple Ways to Fight This Climate Change"

Twelve? So far, you guys have only found one- paying people to lie their asses off about it.

Jackie Gingrich Cushman, Town Hall: " Creating Our Nation's Future -- No More Bread and Circuses"

No more bread, anyway. Not for the bottom 99% of us.

Neil Stevens, Red State: "We’ve spent the whole time bashing Republicans and talking about how great Obama looks on television, when we missed what the true, underlying message was: The President spent his first year in office trying to ignore us, but now has had to come crawling back like the miserable failure that he is."

He came crawling back, and beat the crap out of you. Unfortunately, only the beating was on national TV, not the crawling.

And now a special citation in one of Green Eagle's favorite categories, Republican projection of their worst faults onto others:

Pam Geller, Atlas Shrugs: "In an administration famous for its polarizing partisanship, its thuggish non-negotiating posture and its demonization of anyone who disagrees, Obama deigned to talk to Republicans today. Yes, it's true. It's true!"

Yeah, and he wiped the floor with you, too. It was like watching the Lakers play the New Jersey Nets.

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit: "Obama’s Shocking Admission: Dem’s Plan Will Force Bureaucrats Between You & Your Doctor"

Republican plan will continue forcing greedy corporate bastards, who can never be satisfied no matter how much money they squeeze from you, between you and your doctor. Which sounds better , huh?

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit: "Iranian Regime Executes Two Democracy Protesters"

Jealous, huh, Jim? Why didn't Cheney think of that? Republicans would still be in the White House.

Newsmax: "Breaking: Newt Gingrich Reveals a New 'Contract With America' for 2010"

Who gives a God damn? And let's not forget that Newt's last Contract with America coincided with his political career going down in flames for twelve years, until Conservatives, faced with a bunch of brain-dead lunatics for leaders, decided to try to revive his corpse.

Fat chance, buddies.

Renew America: "Obama court remarks spark reaction from Alito"

I just hope it's an allergic reaction. Next time, I suggest just sleeping through Obama's speech, like Clarence Thomas.

Carly Fiorina, Renew America: "Remind Washington who's in charge"

What, you mean CEO's who paid themselves tens of millions of dollars while running their companies into a ditch? Just like you, huh, Carly?

Patrice Lewis, World Net Daily: "I've been thinking a great deal about poverty lately, specifically its causes as well as what our obligations are (both personal and societal) to alleviate it."

Obligations? According to Patrice, that would be nothing at all. Screw the bastards. Patrice justifies this with a boring diatribe about the grasshopper and the ants, which is apparently from somewhere in the bible. Next time you open the Good Book, try reading the sermon on the mount, Patrice. Never heard of that part, huh?

Jeffrey Folks, American Thinker: "A Really Mediocre President"

Oh well. Better than a really, really, REALLY bad one. Trust me. I speak from experience, Jeffrey.

Russ Vaughn, American Thinker: "Our narrow escape in 2004- Revelations about what a cad and a sleaze John Edwards is should cause all of us to breathe a sigh of relief that Bush won."

Yeah, so instead of someone who had an affair, we got Dick Cheney. Russ, if you think that was a good deal, please get in touch with me. I've got a few thousand shares of Enron stock I'll let you have really cheap.

Astute Bloggers: "THE GOVERNMENT''S MOST POWERFUL TOOL TO SPUR GROWTH IS ALSO THE MOST DIMPLE: AN ACROSS THE BOARD TAX CUT. IT'D BE LIKE GIVING EVERYONE A RAISE."

The most dimple? Well, I'll have to think about that one. I'm not even sure how that would help. And as for giving everyone a raise, it would be just like giving everyone who is already really rich a raise. But then, what else is the Republican party for?

I do, however, want to praise the Astute Bloggers for coming up with such an original answer to our nation's problems- cutting taxes. No one ever thought of that before.

Astute Bloggers: "BOTTOM-LINE: OBAMA A IS A GIFTED LIAR.- OF COURSE IT'S EASY TO BE CONVINCING WHEN YOUR SO DELUDED YOU BELIEVE THE CRAP THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!"

Astute Guys, as far as Green Eagle can tell from watching you people, it's also pretty damned easy to be convincing when you don't believe a word that you are getting paid to say. Do I need to explain myself further? No, I didn't think so.

And by the way, how about working on that grammar? It makes you seem so much less credible when you can't use the English language properly. Oh, except to the Palin crowd, of course.

Henry Makow: "The Myth of Nazi Persecution of Gays ...Only a few thousand authentically homosexual men were condemned to the death-camps by the Nazis."

Oh, only a few thousand. That's okay, then. Hey, those Nazis weren't so bad after all, huh?

And now a special edition of News of the World for Parrots, a very serious subject for Green Eagle:

American Thinker: "Osama parrots the left"

Henry Makow: "Lula -- The Illuminati's Brazilian Parrot"

Man, is the world heading in the right direction. Governments are being turned over from conservatives to talking birds. That's got to be a move in the right direction.

And on that hopeful note, GE will sign off until another day.

Comments

Poll P. said…
Thanks for some laughs and a lot of smiles. Man, what clowns they are.
magpie said…
I liked the bit about birds taking over things.
Green Eagle said…
We're on the march, Magpie.
Anonymous said…
About the Patrice Lewis comment. Right on, Patrice. Oh, Green Eagle, you obviously don't read the Bible... I help, I probably give far more than you to those in need, but it is because I care and want to. Not because I have to. Just a group of lemmings who think you all know better than we do in how we spend OUR money.

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