Note: By "horrible scandal," of course, I mean "ludicrous drivel." Anyway, on with the story.
Today, he presents us with an article inspired by the impending birthday of our country, July 4th:
"Later this week we will celebrate the birth of this nation.
We know where that birth took place – Philadelphia.
We know who the parents were – we call them our "Founding Fathers."
We know there were many witnesses and lots of documentation.
We know all this with certainty, in part, because there is a birth certificate for the nation drafted July 4, 1776, that has been well-preserved and observed ever since. That birth certificate, of course, is known as the Declaration of Independence."
Okay, Joseph, a little far fetched, but we'll hang with you so far.
"Thank goodness America has a birth certificate"
Uh oh. Why do I feel teh lunacy coming on?
"One thing you won't find in the National Archives, though I think you should, is a copy of the birth certificate of the first black president – Barack Hussein Obama.
Don't you think that's strange?"
Still with you there, Joseph. (actually, I'm not still with him, but I thought I'd lead him on a little before I hit him with the left hook. You'll see.)
"I believe documents are important.
They are important for two reasons – to establish facts and for historical purposes.
If documents weren't important, the government wouldn't collect them.
Do you get where I'm going here?"
Yeah, Joseph, right into a big hole that you will never climb out of. My turn now.
I thought I would conduct a little experiment. I went to the National Archives website. It has a nifty search feature (a concept, apparently beyond the ken of Joseph Farah.) So here's what I did. I went right in there and typed "George Bush Birth Certificate" in the little box. I got a message saying "searching ten million documents" and then a couple of seconds later, it said "no documents matched."
Imagine that! Well it must have been an accident. So, I tried another name. In fact, I tried the following names:
Ulysses S. Grant
Rutherford B. Hayes
Chester A. Arthur
William Howard Taft
Warren G. Harding
George H. W. Bush
George W. Bush
Do you recognize that list? (in all fairness, I'm not sure I would have- I looked it up.) It is the list of all of the Republican presidents in the history of our country. And guess what? There is not a single one whose birth certificate is in the National Archives.
So, at last, Mr. Farah, I'm ready to answer your question, "don't you think it's strange" that Barack Obama's birth certificate is not in the National Archives?
No, really, I don't think it's that strange, you malicious nincompoop. And, neither would you, if you had spent fifteen minutes doing a little research, before shooting your mouth off.