Torture Schools

World Net Daily is one of those websites that gives us more than its fair share of amusement. Around the Left Blogosphere, it's called Wing Nut Daily. Here's why, in an article from its leader, Joseph Farah:

"There's a shocking new report out about the abuse of students

in special-education schools.

Congressional investigators have apparently uncovered widespread mistreatment in public special-needs education facilities.....

....Now let's calm down for a moment and think about this.

Who controls the public schools in America?"

Oh oh, I think I can guess what's coming.

"...these are government schools. So why, you might ask, is the government shocked, shocked, I tell you to learn about abuses of this kind in government schools?

And what is the government's solution? More government control – especially central government control. Because we all know that bureaucrats in Washington

love your children more than their parents and the local rubes who actually work with them."

Joe (can I call you Joe? After all, we're getting to know each other so well here.) Joe, here's something that you must have missed in fourth grade, when you were out of school with the mumps: Our great country is actually made up of these things called states (there are 50 of them, Joe) and each state has within it things called cities, where most people live. All of those entities have their own governments. That's right, there is the Federal government (that's the one you are complaining about,) there are state governments, and there are city governments. And it's actually those city governments that run our public schools. Those are whole different governments from the one you hate. Surprising, isn't it?

And as to those local rubes who actually work with children, they are the ones who are supposedly torturing our children, according to you. So actually, maybe it wouldn't be so crazy to give the bureaucrats a shot.
See, we're reaching an understanding already.

"Perhaps they are now running out of private businesses to run, so they will turn their attention to government institutions...."

Silly me. I always thought it was the job of government to run government institutions.

"That reminds me of something. Isn't waterboarding also almost torture? And what did the government do about that – or pretend to do anyway? They closed down Guantanamo Bay, didn't they? At least they promised to close it down....

So how about the same solution for these government-run torture schools?

Shouldn't we just close them down, too?

In fact, in light of this shocking report, shouldn't we just close down all government schools?"

What a serious, worthy suggestion, Joe. Close the schools. Who needs public education anyway, and besides, think of the tax cuts for the rich we could have then. I am so happy to see you people on the right stepping up to the plate and offering serious solutions to our national problems. You know, I heard about a couple of cops who beat some guy up once. Let's close all of the police stations too. How about that idea, Joe? And while we're at it, remember all that stuff about the pedophile priests a few years ago? That was a lot worse than what these teachers are accused of. I am sure you are going to join me in a demand to close down all of the Catholic churches in this country.

And by the way, Joe, waterboarding is torture, not "almost torture," you sick sadist.