Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Wingnut Wrapup

They've been at it lately.  Here's just a small taste:

Katie Pavlich, Town Hall:  "It's Official: Sarah Palin Readies the Fight For 2014"

Oh goody, goody.  I can hardly wait.

Walter E. Williams, Town Hall: Are We Equal?   Are women equal to men? Are Jews equal to gentiles? Are blacks equal to Italians, Irish, Polish and other white people? The answer is probably a big fat no, and the pretense or assumption that we are equal -- or should be equal -- is foolhardy and creates mischief."

Another valuable contribution to our national discourse from one or the right's house negroes.


Of course, the argument is not about whether Green Eagle is equally qualified to play basketball as Lebron James, it is about whether Green Eagle and Lebron James should be treated equally by the government.  Walter knows this perfectly well, but he's willing to play the fool as long as his wingnut welfare checks don't bounce.

Jonah Goldberg, Town Hall:  "There once was a popular sitcom called "Murphy Brown." The title character, played by Candice Bergen, was a news anchor. The show had its moments, but it was also insufferably pleased with itself and its liberalism."


Can't find anything from this century to talk about, Jonah?  This quote is from an article which Jonah titled "The wisdom of Dan Quayle."  If you were after proof of how pathetic today's Republicans are, the fact that they are now heralding Dan Quayle as a wise elder should be all you need.

Terry Jeffrey, Town Hall:  "If Same-sex Marriage Is a 'Right,' There Are No Rights "


Oh yeah, there are, Terry.  For example, your right to avoid making a jackass of yourself, which you can exercise by keeping your mouth shut.  Use it.

Carol Platt Liebeau, Town Hall:  "In my earlier post this morning, I somehow failed to mention the most important inconsistency of all in the position of conservatives who support a judicial redefinition of marriage: How, exactly, do they intend to protect the conscience rights of those who -- for religious reasons -- do not believe in a new definition of marriage?  Or do their First Amendment rights simply dissolve by judicial fiat?  After all, if gay marriage becomes a constitutionally protected right, how can the conscience rights of true religious objectors be accommodated?"

Conscience rights?  What the hell does that mean?  Where is that in the Constitution?  Is it my "conscience right" that wingnut idiots shouldn't be allowed to ruin our country?  No, only right wingers have conscience rights- i.e. the right to have everything exactly the way they want it, however piggish that may be, and whether the vast majority of the country agrees with them or not.  This is sort of the generalized Hastert rule- nothing government does is legitimate unless a majority of the wackos on the right agree to it.

And while we are on the subject, of course this right only applies to Evangelical Christians.  Otherwise, all of these right wingers are endorsing Sharia law.

Neil Bryan Goldberg, Renew America:  "I did not intend nor plan or give any thought to writing this column"


At last, an honest Conservative.  Oh wait- Neil claims that his column was divinely inspired- that's why he didn't have to plan ahead.  Take my word for it- if that is the case, God really needs some remedial education.

Laurie Roth, Renew America:  "All that Americans have held on to and relied on is being assaulted. Obama won't stop until America is forced into submission to his dictatorship plans and the rest of us locked up or killed. What survives the Obama battering rams will be taxed and redistributed to his seduced worshipers. They will be slaves and controlled like mutant little toys, but they will thank Obama and give him their worship.  Obama has his "SS" firmly in place and has been building his private army since 2008."


Right, Laurie.  But wait- there's more!

"To complete the process of transformation and annihilation, Obama has his Obamacare bill in place run by the IRS. This will give him total access to our accounts and literal control over who lives and dies. As in the days of Adolph Hitler, Obama must control our bank accounts and healthcare."

And that's what was so horrible about Hitler- he gave people medical care.  How did I not realize that?  Keeping people healthy- the perfect way to annihilate them!  And where is all this leading the country, according to Laurie?

"God help us if the Supreme Court votes against families, God, states' rights, and marriage. Literally, all hell will break lose, giving Obama more areas to attack and slaughter people. Pastors will be arrested for hate crimes if they quote the wrong scriptures...our children will be completely indoctrinated and perverted by all kinds of sexual acting out on display.  Media would have to shut up or be fined and arrested due to speaking "hate crimes." A moral horror show is on its way, orchestrated by Obama."

Boy, that's a lot worse than Romney, who would have just let his fellow rich people suck the nation into a new depression.  The prospect almost sounds good in contrats to Obama's coming horror show.

Bryan Fischer, Renew America:  "That we're in court at all is already a defeat...There has, of course, been endless speculation already about which way the Supreme Court will go on Prop 8 and DOMA.


Our Founders must be rolling over in their muskets and powder, aghast at the servile submission of a once-free people."


I quote this only to point out that, to right wingers, the only thing worth remembering about the founding fathers is that they had guns.  All the rest is meaningless.  And Bryan Fischer is one of the chief spokesmen of the supposedly religious end of the right wing spectrum.  When I went to school, I was taught that the American Revolution was about something more than the right to take your gun to your grave with you.  I guess that's how much our public education system has been polluted by Communism.

Alan Caruba, Renew America:  "A carbon tax would destroy America"

One more pathetic corporate lie, from a guy who apparently exists for no other purpose than to spread the energy industry's disinformaton.  Wouldn't you love to know how much (or how little) it take to buy the soul of a person like this?

Patrick Buchanan, World Net Daily:  "Who killed the 'new majority'?"

No one, Pat.  You can't kill a fantasy.

Ralph Beeton, American Thinker:  "Trouble is Brewing in America...Ordinary American citizens may need guns and ammunition to defend themselves and their families in the not-so-distant future."

This trouble seems to be because Bill Clinton got a blow job fifteen or twenty years ago.  So, load up your rifles, men!  No blow jobs for Democrats!

Ken Connor, Renew America:  For people of faith in America, the Obama administration's birth control mandate represents an unprecedented assault on religious conscience."


No it doesn't.  It does, however, represent one more opportunity for right wingers to throw a meaningless tantrum because they are such "patriots" that they know better than all the rest of us who is allowed to be President and who isn't.

Conservative psychosis in action:

Victor Davis Hanson, Town Hall:  "We can argue over whether the result of the (Iraq) war was worth the cost. But by January 2009, the enemy was defeated."

Idiot.  Of course, Victor is right to ask this question:

"Did Iraq alone really undermine "respect for Republican economic stewardship," as Noonan suggests? "

No.  It wasn't just Republicans' failed war in Iraq, it was also Republicans' successful war against the American economy.  So, don't despair, Conservatives.  You're still good at wrecking something.

John Ransom, Town Hall:  "Paul Krugman Wins Nobel: Best Supporting Liberal Playing Economist in Cyprus...Obama, John McCain and others- like Paul Krugman- who head up the Bad Idea Brigade, will likely import Cypriot banking methods to the US very soon."


Five years later, and they still can't get over that Nobel.  Anyway, if you want to see what Krugman really thinks about Cyprus, try looking here:  Needless to say, it doesn't have much to do with Ransom's claims.

It took me less than 20 seconds to find that, by googling "Krugman Cyprus."  Ransom isn't mistaken; he is lying.  Quel surprise.

Bridget Johnson, PJ Media:  "Sen. Lee: 3 Reasons Why I Threatened to Block Obama’s Gun Proposals"

Because you are a corrupt jerk- well, that's reason number one.  And as for the other two, let's just see here...hey, you know what?  Who cares?

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit:  "NY Lawmaker Introduces Bill to Make Obama President For Life"

Well, no he didn't.  Even by Jim's account, here is what he did:

"New York Democratic Rep. Jose Serrano reintroduced a bill in Congress on Friday to repeal the 22nd Amendment, which places term limits on the U.S. presidency.  The bill, which has been referred to committee, would allow Barack President Obama to become the first president since Franklin Roosevelt to seek a third term in office."

Of course, it would do no such thing, since a Constitutional change would not apply to the current officeholder, but why miss a chance to attack Obama for being a dictator?  Here's the illustration that accompanied Jim's idiotic article:



The story apparently comes originally from the Daily Caller, most recently noted for having paid two prostitutes to claim that they had sex with a Democratic Senator, and then releasing the "story" six days before the last election.  Of course, with the wingnuts, it's always hard to tell who started the lie and who is just repeating it.

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit:  "Sorry Liberal Media… Adam Lanza Was Not an NRA Member"


Nobody ever said he was.  He did, however, earn a couple of NRA gun safety certificates.  I guess he misunderstood part of the course, or perhaps they don't teach people that rule number one is not to go around shooting little kids.

Jen Schroeder, Renew America:  "Jesus, three days and three nights in the heart of the earth, not tomb"

Well, thanks for straightening that out, Jen.  We'd hate to think we misrepresented the details of your infantile fantasy.

David P. Goldman, PJ Media:  "Iraq Didn’t Destroy the Republican Party … but Iran Might"

The thrust of this interesting argument is that Bush and Cheney's colossal blunder in Iraq didn't hurt the Republican party one bit, but if we don't commit an even more colossal blunder by attacking Iran, well, that will really hurt Republicans.  And of course, David helpfully points out:

"Republican leaders should hammer at this issue relentlessly. If Obama–contrary to the world’s well-founded expectations–were to take action against Iran, we would take the credit."


Of course you would.  Right up to the moment when it turned out to be one of the worst military disasters in recorded history, just like Iraq.  Then, you would be blaming it on everyone else on earth except yourselves.  Given your track record in Vietnam and Iraq, what else could we expect?

Claudia Rosett, PJ Media:  "What’s the Deal With the UN Arms Trade Treaty?   Why did Iran, Syria, and North Korea block the UN Arms Trade Treaty?"

Oh I don't know, maybe they did it to show solidarity with American Conservatives, who have been railing for years that this treaty is a plot to impose one world government on the United States.  Nice company, you're keeping there.

Think I'm exaggerating?

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit:  "St. Louis Mayor Francis Slay held a gun control rally in downtown St. Louis Saturday afteroon. Dr. Robert Flood , director of pediatric emergency at SLU, gave the keynote speech at the rally. The good doctor urged supporters to call congress and turn your rights and sovereignty over to United Nations. "

By approving the same arms trade treaty that Iran, Syria and North Korea are against.  This was from today, but I could find you literally hundreds of similar posts from right wingers.

Alan Caruba, Renew America:  "Hillary's Burdens...Am I the only one who thinks that speculations and predictions about whether Hillary Clinton will run for the presidency in 2016 are premature?  This is not to dismiss the Democrat's capacity for self-delusion when it comes to selecting its next candidate for the presidency. "

The Democrats'  capacity for self-delusion when it comes to selecting its next candidate for the presidency?  The Democrats' capacity?  Man, could you even think of a better example of right wingers' ability to hallucinate their own failings onto their opponents?  Talk about living in a fantasy world.

Michael Youssef, Town Hall:  "We have come a long way since April 19, 1775—the day after Paul Revere’s famous midnight ride—when the British redcoats, under the command of Major John Pitcairn, arrived in Lexington, Massachusetts.  There, they confronted a ragtag regiment of Minutemen, with Pitcairn demanding that they lay down their arms “in the name of George the Sovereign King of England.”  A Lexington minister by the name of Rev. Jonas Clarke was said to have responded on behalf of all the Minutemen: “We recognize no Sovereign but God and no King but Jesus.”

We have come a long way, America…. the wrong way."


I just offer this item as one of my favorite things lately- the systematic forgery of quotations supposedly by the founding fathers, designed to make the gullible think that the abominable practices of right wingers today were just what the founders wanted. 

There is not one shred of evidence that this ever happened.  The earliest known account of this is in a speech given by John Ashcroft in 1999.  Since then, it has also been credited numerous times by wingnuts to John Adams and John Hancock.  You can find a much fuller account of this particular fraud here, if you are interested.


Ron Arnold, Principia Scientifica International:  "Climategate leaker: Our civilization is being destroyed by lying “science” elitists"

And here Ron's leaker is:



How could we ever find anyone more patently trustworthy to tell us that tens of thousands of scientists are engaged in a massive fraud?  By the way, in case you are wondering, Ron Arnold is no neophyte either.  He is the executive VP of the Center for the Defense of Free Enterprise.  Their funders include, among others, Exxon, and of course the Koch brothers.  Caveat Emptor.


Stuff is already piling up for next time, but that's more than enough for today.  Bye!

4 comments:

Poll P. said...

Gotta admit,t he Smiley Face button on the dictator's uniform is a nice touch. These wingers have a sense of humor after all.

Cthulhu said...

Yeah, but seeing the CMH on him turns my stomach. Couldn't we find something better instead?

Green Eagle said...

Who is "we?" This picture is from a wingnut. I am not particularly zealous about such things, but even I thought it was tasteless to put the medal of honor around Obama's neck. But then, compared to showing Obama as an ape. or as Hitler (both of which they do all the time) I guess this is a pretty minor specimen of tastelessness.

Anonymous said...

Go Green Eagle. My shoes remain clean because you wade through sh_t. Thank you. It occurs to me the term "wingnut" is no longer accurate. It's too stable. Perhaps we can "motorize it" somehow. Maybe "auto gyro nut" or something. How about "loose screw aholics".