Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Wingnut Wrapup

Today's Wingnut Wrapup dedicated to Dinesh D'Souza, for the most piggish analogy I've heard lately:

"AN INTERESTING PARALLEL: MLK was targeted by J. Edgar Hoover, an unsavory character; I was targeted by the equally unsavory B. Hussein Obama."

Martin Luther King, of course, being targeted for his advocacy of equal treatment under the law; D'Souza found guilty of campaign finance fraud.  Exactly the same thing.  Just don't count on having a national holiday to remember your great sacrifice, Dinesh, at least not until Rand Paul or Rick Santorum is elected President.

And how about this:

Willard "Mitt" Romney:  "Under President Obama the rich have gotten richer, income inequality has gotten worse and there are more people in poverty in American than ever before."

Run, Mitt, Run.  Say, ready to release those tax returns yet?

Katy Kieffer, Town Hall:  "Why Orthodox Jewish Women are Happy"

Why do you think?  It's because they shut up and do what they are told.  That's the key to happiness, apparently.

Matt Barber, Town Hall:  "Incest: The Next Frontier In ‘Reproductive Freedom’

Yup, in case you haven't heard, liberals are about to expend all their political capital campaigning for legalized incest.  I bet you knew that already, right?

Shawn Mitchell, Town Hall:  "Give Obama Credit for Lower Gas Prices?  Ronald Reagan was a rhetorical genius. He was smarter than you and I. He could..."

Well, enough of that.  What does Ronald Reagan have to do with answering Shawn's question about lower gas prices?  Who the hell knows?  But I guess mentioning Ronald Reagan means the Conservative has automatically won the argument.  Because- Ronald Reagan!!!

Gayle Trotter, Town Hall:  "Iraqi Ambassador to the US: We Must Cleanse Iraq of ISIS"

To quote Tonto, "Who you mean WE, Kemosabe?"  How about doing it yourself, Mr. Ambassador?

Leon Wolf, Red State:  “Hate Speech” is not “Any Speech You Hate”

No, but if you are a right winger, it is any speech you like.

Jake, Red State:  "The Obamacare Penalty could be Bigger than Many People are Expecting"

Yeah, it could require quartering lizard people in your house too.  No evidence that it will do either, but you never know.

Leon Wolf, Red State:  "Fiorina 2016: A Campaign Without a Raison D’ĂȘtre...In a year in which the GOP promises to field its strongest field of qualified and experienced candidates in a generation, and in which there promises to be a veritable buffet of viable options for establishment and movement conservatives alike, for some reason the existence of Carly Fiorina’s bizarrely pointless 2016 campaign continues to be a story worth reporting on for the political media."

In a field absolutely stuffed to the gills with campaigns without any raison d'etre, apparently the only one to raise the ire of Leon is the one by a woman.  Funny, that.  Back in the kitchen, Carly.

Karina Fabian, PJ Media:  "Why Frozen Is Actually About Gun Control"

Because...Oh, why bother.

Alan Caruba, Renew America:  "NASA keeps telling "warmest" lies...Remember that 2014 started off with something called a "polar vortex" to describe the incredibly cold weather being experienced and remember, too, that we were being told that it was evidence of global warming! That's how stupid the "Warmists" who keep saying such things think we are...The U.S. and the rest of the world are setting records, but they are records for how cold it has become everywhere."

Well, let's take a look:

It's all a lie, see?  Look at all that cold.

Jerome Corsi, World Net Daily:  "BENGHAZI INQUEST COMPROMISED...'I think Gowdy has been warned away or threatened'...The independent Citizens’ Commission on Benghazi, or CCB, has been doing its own investigation and working behind the scenes for the past year and a half to make sure Congress does the job the executive branch has failed to do: namely, to get to the truth of what happened and to hold people accountable."

Benghazi.  Because what would Wingnut crazy be without a little Benghazi?  By the way, The "Independent Citizens' Commission on Benghazi" seems to be a creation of World Net Daily, one of the all time leaders in appearances at Wingnut Wrapup.

And let's hit the stupidity of the left for once:

John Nichols, The Nation:  "What to Do About Record Low Voter Turnout? Call a Holiday!"

How about this?  Maybe an allegedly left-leaning party should run on policies that the overwhelming majority of Americans want, such as fair taxation of the rich, a decent environment, a government that actually concerns itself about living conditions in the country, a committment to not act like bullies all over the world, etc.  Maybe that would work better than a holiday.

Senator John McCain:  "No one understands the world today in the way that Lindsey Graham does, in my view.

Yeah, like nobody understands how to do brain surgery like Donald Duck.

Leah Barkoukis, Town Hall:  "European Law Enforcement Agencies: On Second Thought, Maybe Firearms Would Be Helpful"

Because they didn't have any.

I guess Leah didn't watch much TV during the French terrorist attacks a couple of weeks ago.

And, the psychotic delusion of the day:

Michael Schaus, Town Hall:  "The Democrat Party Killed the Conservative Dream of MLK Jr."

There is not sarcasm nor outrage enough in the world to respond to that remark.  But believe me, it represents the dominant Conservative response to MLK day this year.

Moe Lane, Red State:  "Remember when ‘ritual human sacrifice’ was an archaic term?"

No, but I do remember when "torture" was an archaic term.  Too bad it didn't stay that way.

Labor Union Report, Red State:  "Boeing Unionization Poses An Existential Threat To South Carolina’s Economy"

Tough shit, buddy.  Maybe you guys shouldn't have built your economy around who could get their employees to work for the least.  In case you didn't notice, Boeing had an eighty year history of building great passenger planes, and then they closed down their union plant and moved to South Carolina, where they could pay non-union people half of what the old employees got.  The first plane produced there? The Dreamliner, which they can hardly keep in the air.  Coincidence?  Maybe. Maybe not.

And someone needs a history lesson:

Kathy Shaidle, PJ Media:  "Isn't it weird how central Charles Manson was to the Sixties' "peace and love" scene? "

Anyway, Kathy also claims that David Crosby was worse than Charlie Manson, and tells about a thousand other lies.  About a bunch of sixties musicians.  Which proves, I guess, that liberals are evil. As I always like to point out, when you have to attack someone from fifty years ago, it just proves that you've got nothing on the people you hate today.

Stephen Green, PJ Media:  "Study: Gay Mormon Men Divorce Straight Mormon Women"

How surprising.

Joel Gehrke, National Review Online:  "Senator Jeff Sessions (R., Ala.) urged colleagues not to oppose the House-passed legislation blocking President Obama’s executive actions on immigration, warning that Congress will be “a museum piece” if they do."

"Museum piece:"  something that is on display to the public but no longer serves its intended function.  I think the Republicans made Congress a museum piece about six years ago.

Guy Benson, Town Hall:  "Obama Administration Releases Convicted Al Qaeda Operative From Civilian Prison"

He served his term.  But who cares?  Lock him up forever.  That's justice American style.  And notice, it's the "Obama administration" that let him out, not the nation's justice system.  I guess the notion that you get out of jail when you've served your time is just another one of those outdated liberal ideas, now that we are in a Perpetual War on Terror.

John Stossel, Town Hall:  "President Obama sure is consistent. His State of the Union address sounded like his other speeches: What I've done is great! America is in a much better position. We've created a manufacturing sector that's adding jobs. More oil is produced at home. I cut deficits in half!"

All of which are, apparently, bad things.  And by the way, John, Obama cut the deficits by two thirds, not half.  Remind me again: what did your guys Reagan and Bush do to the deficit?

Now, this particularly incisive analysis of the State of the Union Address:

Michael Schaus, Town Hall:  "Comrade Obama Reads Teleprompter for 6th Time to Both Houses of Congress"

Comrade...teleprompter...  Boy, they'll never give up a good smear once they have found one.  And while we are on the subject of Communism:

Ransom Notes Radio:  "Two Free Years of Communist College for Everyone!"

Communist college.  Because if it is good for anyone but billionaires, it's Communism.

Bill Tatro, Town Hall:  "From Multiplier to Domino...The reality of falling gas prices has finally hit home. It is no longer 1973 when the bulk of every dollar put into the tank went to a Sheik who could care less about the well-being of the American public."

Oh no, things are a lot different now.  Today, a lot more of that money goes into the pockets of a sociopathic billionaire who could care less about the well-being of the American public.  That's a lot better.  Because unlike the Saudi Sheiks, those billionaires are spending much more of their money right here at home- buying elections.

Streiff, Red State:  "Obama uses SOTU to announce surrender to Iran"

Man, I must have dozed off during that part.

Alan Joelny, Red State:  "Obama Omits “God Bless the United States of America” at End of SOTU Speech"

IMPEACH!  What he said instead is, "God bless this country we love."  He is clearly a Communist Muslim if he doesn't say it exactly the way Alan Joelny want him to!  By contrast, Alan points out that Reagan ended ninety percent of his speeches asking for divine guidance.  Of course, in Obama's defense, Reagan needed divine guidance a lot more than Obama does.

Paula Boyard, PJ Media:  "Ted Cruz Wins SOTU Postgame with ‘More Cowbell! More Cowbell!’

Which apparently was decided on the basis of which responder could make the biggest dick out of themselves.  Who didn't know that Ted was going to win that one?

Barry Farber, World Net Daily:  "BEING FAIR TO ROMNEY"

Ha ha.  Why?

And finally, a special shoutout to Joni Ernst, the first person in years to have delivered the Republican response to the State of the Union address without destroying her own career in ten minutes.


Magpie said...

"Katy Kieffer, Town Hall: "Why Orthodox Jewish Women are Happy"

Why do you think? It's because they shut up and do what they are told."

I must be an Orthodox Jewish woman.

ez said...

" Willard "Mitt" Romney: "Under President Obama the rich have gotten richer, income inequality has gotten worse and there are more people in poverty in American than ever before." "

The results speak so well to the Trickle Down theory of economics. don't they? Yet the republicans double down on the need to protect the 'job creators'from taxes.

the yellow fringe said...

"NASA keeps telling "warmest" ---- In most counties in the US you can look up at the agriculture department, or even the local co-op the soil temperature. Some of these records go back 100 years. But Russia way back in the days of the Tzar, was the soil classification/study center of the world. Most our soil types are Russian words. Well, they have soil temp for some regions back 150 years. I have looked at them on line, as well as counties where I live and farm. Soil temp is higher than then. This leads to higher rates of evaporation, and earlier germination for all things, weeds as well as crops. The trend is about the same as atmosphere temp. Like us, a fever of 4 or 5 degrees kills, plants too, a few degrees hoses up 10,000 years of agriculture.

Green Eagle said...

Of course, the Republican liars are aided in their climate denial because the Eastern US is the only significant land area in the world with below normal temperatures. None of the suckers that vote for them will ever see anything like this graphic, but they will all remember the result of th polar vortex.