I said after the first Biden-Jackass debate that both people won- Biden in the real world and Trump in the disgusting fantasy land in which he and his supporters live. Anyone who watched this event saw one of the most loathsome displays of egotism and viciousness ever seen on TV, and every one of us knows it. Here's a quote from Hanke Stuever at the Washington Post, that pretty well sums it up:
"95 minutes of proof that the nation has slipped into irredeemable darkness...Years from now, we’ll rank this disruptive non-debate alongside terrorist attacks for TV that made us despair."
And he wasn't talking about Joe Biden there, who acted like a perfectly normal human being, except for his restraint in not walking over and punching Trump in the face when he attacked Biden's dead son.
But of course, that is not how Trump supporters are going to be ordered to see it, and here are their orders. You could probably guess exactly what sorts of lies are going to be told about what happened, so this may be rather boring, but it's just as well to make a record of it.
First, let's start with a Prediction from Kurt Schlichter at Town Hall about how the debate will go, written before it happened:
"I’m not going to believe Gropey J will actually debate Trump until someone pushes him out from backstage toward the podium. But if it happens, by the time you read this, the debate will be over, yet there’s no need for me to wait to write this post-mortem. According to the media, Biden won and Trump lost.
Well, that's for fucking sure, Kurt.
It doesn’t matter if a radio earpiece fell out of his head, if he started rapping his cover of “WAP,” or if he had to do the Nadler shuffle offstage, Grandpa Badfinger won.
None of which happened, of course. Trump, on the other hand, lost his cool about a hundred times, and behaved worse than a three year old.
His rehearsed one-liners, honed during dozens of post-lid training sessions, may fall flatter than Mazie Hirono’s brain waves yet they will nominate Joe for a seat at the Algonquin Roundtable. He can literally talk about tying an onion to his belt, which was the style back in the day, and they’ll applaud. He can drool, make body noises, or address Chris Wallace “Hey, fat!” and the media will flap its flippers.
Is that what you saw? By the way, in case you wondered, Kurt did not have one word to say about how Donald Trump would behave. Now on to Kurt's review of the debate:
Kurt Schlichter, Town Hall: "It was a bit surprising that Grandpa Badfinger showed up Tuesday, and also a bit surprising that he didn’t start a chat with an invisible friend or Nadler himself on stage. Nor was it surprising that Donald Trump came in hard and fast...Who won? Trump. This was not a “disaster” or “a mess” simply because it got loud and unruly."
Loud and unruly. Just what Americans want from their President.
"With one possible caveat, it was not likely to move the needle. And this was peak Biden – he gets no better than this. He did a dozen early am lids prepping to basically achieve not falling over and mumbling to himself as he jerked and twitched on the floor."
That sort of kindergarten insult is what passes for humor from Conservatives. In fact, I am not sure I have ever seen any Conservative "humor" that didn't amount to infantile taunts of their enemies.
So, even though there was not one sign of the demented Joe Biden that Trump has been shouting about for months now, Kurt is going to tell his readers that there was. And here is one of the main themes of the night; Believe me, not your lying eyes. You actually saw the drooling, mentally deficient Biden we have been talking about for months, so shut up and get in line
"Now, the prissycons are all up in arms because Trump was mean and interrupted people. Boo hoo – tighten the hell up, people. Why would you be smiley while getting tagged-teamed by a media hack and Methuselah?"
Now, a second theme: that a Fox News announcer conspired with Biden to make Trump look like an ignorant bully, rather than Trump having done that all on his own.
"There are lots of potential voters, including ones who usually do not vote, who will respond well to a show of raw strength...Real men, and real women, don’t vote for submissives."
And another major Republican theme. Real Americans truly want a vicious, vindictive, out of control liar, so there are tons of them out there who are going to vote for him regardless of his unfitness.
Well, let's get down to some of the malicious and yet pathetic attempts by Republicans to rewrite the history of this event. I've tried to categorize them, but many of the items could be listed in more than one category. Well, at least I've spared you having to read them twice; it's bad enough as it is.
Believe Me, Not You Lying Eyes
Before it's News: "POTUS Crushes the Enemy"
Grant Stinchfield, Newsmax: "Charlottesville has been debunked"
What, the whole city doesn't exist? Oh, Grant meant that Trump didn't really say what he was recorded saying about Nazis being good people. Okay, then.
Kirstinn Taylor, Gateway Pundit: "Trump Addresses Proud Boys Controversy; Calls on Biden to Condemn Antifa"
Actually, he didn't address the proud boys controversy, he just used it as an opportunity to attack Biden with more lying claims.
Brooke Singman, Fox News: "Trump campaign, RNC declare Trump the winner of first presidential debate..."The Trump campaign and the Republican National Committee declared President Trump the winner of the first presidential debate against Joe Biden Tuesday night, slamming the former vice president as “too weak” and touting Trump as a “strong president on top of his game.
Oh they did, did they? Well, I guess that settles that then. I mean, the Trump campaign and the RNC wouldn't stretch the truth, now.
“President Trump just turned in the greatest debate performance in presidential history, displaying a command of the facts and control of the conversation,” Trump campaign manager Bill Stepien said in a statement Tuesday night.”
Oh, he did, did he? Well, I guess that settles that then.
Freedom Works: "Lost and confused man stumbles onto debate stage"
Hint: They weren't talking about Trump. Go figure.
Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit: "They Have a Guy Who Doesn’t Know Where He Is – That’s Why They’re Freaked Out” – Former Trump Campaign Manager Steve Bannon Weighs in on Biden’s Disastrous Night...Biden two or three sentences into things forgets where he is. If you gotta let him go, next time I’d advice the president to be very strategic about where he cuts him off or where he inserts the comments. And the reason is Biden doesn’t know where he is… embrace this Democrats. You’ve traumatized your base so they don’t want to go and vote… They have a guy who doesn’t know where he is all the time. And that’s why they’re freaked out."
They just go on and on saying this, even though there is not a sign that it is true.
Tyler O'Neil, PJ Media: "Debate Recap: Trump Wins, Biden Doesn't Faint...Trump got in more clear statements and Biden came across as shifty"
Biden Cheated During the Debate-Part One: He Collaborated with Mike Wallace to Sandbag Trump
Before it's News: "Evil, Cheating Exposed During Debate! "It was a two against one performance against Trump"
Biden ganging up with a Fox news announcer. Yeah, that's likely.
Leah Barkoukis, Town Hall: "Frank Luntz's Surprising Discovery with Post-debate Focus Group of Undecided Voters...There was a lot of mudslinging, name-calling..."
No word about who was doing the mudslinging.
"...and moderator-turned-debater Chris Wallace did not help matters at all, whether he was shutting down Trump, coming to Biden's rescue, or peddling lies about critical race theory and Trump's Charlottesville comments."
More ganging up there.
John Nolte, Breitbart: "Joe Biden and Chris Wallace Started It by Interrupting Trump Numerous Times First"
The last time I heard that argument it was from a three year old: "No, mama, he hit me first!"
Right wing view of the debate, cartoon style
Biden Cheated During the Debate-Part Two: He took drugs or used a Wire or Something
Derek Hunter, Town Hall: "I have to note Joe Biden’s eyes. Am I the only person who noticed his eyes were dilated during the entire debate? In the debate, he looked vacant, more vacant than usual. Not a lost vacant, a “not there” vacant. Check out clips and look at his eyes, they remind me of the Quint speech from Jaws about a shark’s eyes, “lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eyes.” That was Joe Biden’s eyes, at least to me, during the debate.
I’m not suggesting he was on mind-focusing drugs, but I am curious that one of the side effects of Adderall is dilated pupils...Ultimately, Joe’s performance was…missing, he was just there. A physical body on the stage that didn’t answer questions or offer policies, simply parroted talking points and hurled childish insults."
Drugs or demons...We ask, you decide.
And here is the evidence of a wire:
The left picture has been widely publicized by Republicans as some sort of wireless receiver. It is actually his dead son Beau's rosary, which Joe wears around his wrist. The other picture, obviously a fold in Biden's shirt, is alleged to be a wire connecting the rosary receiver to an invisible earpiece.
Trump's Debate Performance Was Another Example of Him Playing Fifty Seven Dimensional Chess
Tauren Dyson, Newsmax: "David Bossie to Newsmax TV: Trump Showed More Intensity Than Biden"
Yeah, more intensity. More rabid lunacy, I think you mean, Tauren. Here's someone else who showed more intensity than Biden when he spoke, just for reference.
Andrea Widberg, American Thinker: "The Trump debate decoded: He won, and he won big...With 24 hours having passed since the first presidential debate, it’s becoming clear that Trump won in a big way. It wasn’t an apparent victory, but it was a real one"
Forget what you saw, and believe what we tell you. By the way, we do not need to tell you why we are claiming Trump won. You have your orders, now get to work.
Leah Barkoukis, Town Hall: "This debate has actually convinced some undecided voters to not vote at all...So maybe a method to the madness here. Trump's strategy of mud wrestling with Biden made Joe also look unattractive to any undecideds left. Luntz group said many undecideds wouldn't vote at all. That makes turning your base what will decide this election. Big advantage to Trump."
Apparently Frank Luntz, a right wing operative who has spent a half century manipulating "focus groups" into saying what he wants them to, can't find a thing that made anyone want to vote for Trump, so he is taking some kind of satisfaction in the fact that, after four years of the Trump horror show, this ninety minute debate didn't convince any new people that they have had enough of him. Advantage Trump!
Democrats Know Trump Won
Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit: "They Know Who Won: Thoroughly Defeated Democrats Urge Joe Biden to Cancel Future Debates"
Because the Democrats know they lost, not because they do not want to waste further time giving TV exposure to a psychotic bully. Right.
"Trump also managed to expose what a nasty jerk Biden is. That matters. With Trump, we’re used to it. From Biden, who poses as “Mr. Nice Everyman,” it’s jarring and ugly."
How can you even comment on such a bald faced lie? Or the notion that it's fine for Trump to act like an infantile bastard, but not for Biden show even mild anger at, for example, having his dead son mocked.
Andrea Widberg, American Thinker: "At a rough estimate, Americans are 40% for Trump, 40% for Biden, and 20% up for grabs. Most candidates try to get half of their supporters to the polls and hope for 51% of the independent votes."
At a rough estimate in the real world, Americans are 40% for Trump (for a reason we will never really understand) and 50% for Biden. Subtract the few idiots who are going to vote for the Green Party or the Libertarians, you really have only about 5% up for grabs, and that is being generous. After four years of his Presidency, when a guy has to make up ten percent of the electorate in the last month, things do not really look too good for him, regardless of the fantasies of people like Andrea. Of course, there is still the cheating, what is really what she is counting on. Like every other Republican she knows she can't win a fair election. That's why they spend more time rigging things than they do really campaigning.
Let's Just Straight Out Lie
Tyler O'Neil, PJ Media: "Note to AOC, Liz Warren, Kamala: Trump Is NOT a White Supremacist"
He's just the nicest, kindest person on earth. And the smartest, too. Did you know that? Well, since that other guy whose picture I showed above died. I heard someone refer to people like him as truly find people, you know.
Bryan Joondeph, American Thinker: "Trump accomplished what he needed in the first debate...Trump’s goal was to shore up his base, to make sure they vote. Previous milquetoast candidates like John McCain and Mitt Romney failed to rally the GOP base and both lost potentially winnable elections. Trump will not make that mistake."
Not shoring up his base. A mistake he won't make, if his base consists of a pack of half starved, slavering animals, which it seems to.
"Biden needed much prep for this debate. For Trump it was just another day, whether at a debate, a Trump rally or a press conference facing a hostile media. Trump could repeat this performance every day, Biden cannot."
True. Trump could repeat this performance every day, because that is who he is, like a three year old throwing a tantrum. No practice needed. Biden could not do that even once, because he is not a sick monster of a human being.
"Why would he change a winning formula? Trump is a businessman and knows well what happens to businesses who stray from their core mission."
What, they lose all their money and go bankrupt? Trump sure has a reason to know that lesson, having squandered two fortunes that were given to him and gone bankrupt six times, but I don't think that is what Bryan is referring to.
Matt Vespa, Town Hall: "Fact Check the Left: Did Trump Refuse To Denounce White Supremacists in First Presidential Debate? We’re back to this crap again."
It was Joe Biden that was Really the Evil One, or Let's Project Trump's Faults on the Other Guy.
Before It's News: "Joe Biden is posessed by legions of demons"
This has something to do with the look in Biden's eyes. Whatever. Another story said that Biden's eyes looked funny because he was wearing contact lens versions of Google Glass, something which does not exist, through which his handlers are feeding him answers.
Doris O'Brien, American Thinker: "Debate 2020: Joe Biden was disgusting"
If being a calm, sensible person is disgusting, which it apparently is to a lot of wingnuts.
"As for temperament and body language, Joe seemed glassy-eyed with concentration."
He was concentrating on the subject matter being discussed. That is a major flaw in a President compared to just acting like an ignorant jackass. You want to see Trump looking glassy eyed, look at him right after he has snorted some Adderall.
"(Biden) looked pale next to his ruddy challenger."
This is actually my favorite right wing take from the whole event. Biden looked pale compared to Trump. Of course we all know that Trump doesn't look pale because he has smeared himself with a half inch of orange makeup, but I guess that just proves how much more manly he is than Biden.
John Carney, Breitbart: "Biden Spent the First Debate Flooding America with a Torrent of Lies...Biden lies unnecessarily, habitually, and without hesitation. When caught lying, he responds with nasty personal attacks. Even more galling, Biden lies about things that he shouldn’t because they are easily checkable. There are publicly available facts that refute his data."
Talk about projection.
Andrea Widberg, American Thinker: "Trump also managed to expose what a nasty jerk Biden is. That matters. With Trump, we’re used to it. From Biden, who poses as “Mr. Nice Everyman,” it’s jarring and ugly "Trump gave his base red meat. Even those who disliked his style will vote for him. Meanwhile, Biden left his base with a sour taste in their mouths, knowing they’re being used."
It's okay when Trump is a vicious bully. It's exactly what the would-be vicious bullies that make up his base want. If we just accuse poor Joe Biden of the same thing, people will forget about Trump's behavior every day.
Well, enough. Far more than enough. And as usual, I need to point out that this is just a small sample of what is out there, and many of the websites quoted above get hundreds of thousands of hits every day. I give the final comment, about Chris Wallace, to Charlie Pierce:
"Absent the ability to get up, walk over to the president*'s podium, and beat his microphone to smithereens with a hammer, Wallace did pretty much as well as could be expected as the concierge of Bedlam."
What a miserable job the Republicans have done of preserving our country.
Okay, okay, one more Republican cartoon: