Thursday, March 15, 2012

Wingnut Wrapup

Time for another descent into the "thinking" that drives the Republican party these days:

Gina Miller, Renew America:  "Last week, steam shot out of my head as I read an e-mail press release that came here to the radio station. It was followed a day later by a glowing story in our local newspaper. It was the proud announcement of an award from the U.S. Green Building Council being given to a housing development in our Mississippi Gulf Coast city of Ocean Springs. Apparently this new housing development has met all the criteria to be praised as "green" and "sustainable," and an example of so-called "smart growth."

What's wrong with that? Well, just everything. What am I talking about? I am talking about the Constitution-busting theft of private property rights and heavy-handed control of our way of life."

Giving someone an award...apparently, that's what passes for "Constitution-busting theft of private property rights and heavy-handed control of our way of life."  At least if you are a Democrat.  And Gina, if steam is really shooting out of your head, you are probably due for a tuneup.  See your mechanic before you need some really expensive aftermarket parts.

Steven Kokx (yes, that's right- that is what he claims his name is,) Renew America:  "Santorum's political suicide...Rather than sticking to his considerable working-class, Reagan-Democrat appeal, he kept wandering back to his austere social conservatism."

"Austere" apparently being a conservative synonym for batshit crazy.

Lloyd "Colored Man For Hire Cheap" Marcus, Renew America:  "Today, women who have fornicated with every male within a ten block radius of their home go on national TV and are celebrated as victims."

This is in reference, of course, to the woman attacked as a slut by Rush Limbaugh.  Apparently, Lloyd feels free to accuse her of having " fornicated with every male within a ten block radius" without a shred of evidence about her real sexual activity.  Lloyd, go to hell, the sooner the better.

Bryan Fischer, Renew America:  "Secular sharia: Imam Obama to Christians: convert, submit or go to prison"

Does this man ever tell the truth?  Note:  Bryan is what passes for a good Catholic these days.  Go figure.

Ed Lansky, American Thinker:  "Obama tells the Iranians not to call his bluff - but why shouldn't they?"

Oh, I don't know.  Maybe because it's not a bluff?  You might want to check in on Osama Bin Laden and Moammar Gaddafi for some input on that one.

Mark J. Fitzgibbons, American Thinker:  "Santorum's intellectual evolution to a strong constitutional conservative"

You call that evolution?  Finally, conservative evidence that evolution is a myth.

Floyd and Mary Beth Brown, Town Hall:  "Sheriff Joe Arpaio Exposes Forgery of Obama's Selective Service Registration "

First the short birth certificate, then the long birth certificate.  Then, some incomprehensible nonsense about his social security number, now this.  It will never end- just one time wasting, racist lie after another, and they are so proud of themselves for the speed at which they can replace a discredited one with a new one.  Man, these people need to find something constructive to do with their time.  How about Macrame, guys?

Marita Noon, Town Hall:  "High Gas Prices Advance Obama's Socialist Agenda"

A few sentences into this pathetic screed is the following:

"Until the current precipitous price increases, energy seemed absent from the overall debate. Now the GOP candidates are all talking about how they would maximize American resources to bring down the price of gas and, rightly so, putting President Obama on the defense. "

So, Marita, exactly how is this good for Obama?  Marita never tells us that.

Star Parker, World Net Daily:  "If you think about it, Andrew Breitbart’s untimely passing from this life, at the age of 43, might be seen as the ultimate message that this man of media could deliver."

What, better dead than red?  Really, getting into a screaming match with some guy in a bar and then dropping dead on the way home is not my idea of a great message.

Betsy Galliher, American Thinker:  "Girl Scouts: The Awful Truth"

Believe me, you don't want to know.

Conservative Crusader:  "Could Obama be Impeached over Libya?"

Now, not only are they ready to impeach him over something he supposedly did wrong, they think they can impeach him over something he did right.  Talk about a no-win situation.  Oh, except for winning this November.  Just letting you know, so you don't get too depressed after it happens, Mr. Crusader.

Silverfiddle, Western Hero:  "When Rick Santorum preached about the Devil attacking America I was doing a face palm while my wife was standing and cheering.

"It's about time somebody told the truth!"  She was fresh off of seeing her prayers answered as Univision announced God had given Hugo Chavez another tumor, "hopefully fatal, and before the election."

She was praying for someone to get cancer?  Silverfiddle, I think you need to sit her down and have a talk with her about what it means to be a Christian.  I'm not sure she gets it.

J. Christian Adams, Pajamas Media:  "Al-Qaeda Bar Advancing Inside DOJ...Obama promotes defender of American Taliban John Walker Lindh."

Yes, if your law firm defends a person the right doesn't like, you are a member of Al Qaida.  J. Christian Adams, for those who may have forgotten, was a Bush appointment to the Department of Justice, where he devoted all his time to investigating oppression of right wing Christians.

Bridget Johnson, Pajamas Media:  "Cheney: Don't Count on U.S. Intel Assessments on Iran"

Well, we will certainly take that advice seriously, considering how accurate U.S. intel assessments were under Cheney.

World Net Daily:  "Witchcraft growing threat to kids in U.K."

Right.  We'll keep that in mind.  Idiots.

Jack Cashill, American Thinker:  "Time for New Look at 2008 Obama Passport Breach"

In 2008, some Bush administration officials were caught illegally snooping in Obama's passport files.  This proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that Obama was up to something deeply criminal.  Jack finishes his column with the following words:  "Breitbart lives!"

Wrong again, Jack.

Arlen Williams, Renew America:  "GOP voters: don't fall for pundits' psyops, Mitt Romney is a traitor"

And Arlen means it, too:
"Traitor" is extreme term. Yet that is what he is, by thoroughly demonstrated conspiracy fact."

Conspiracy fact.  Man, I couldn't have put it better myself. 

World Net Daily:  "Is this the face of the perfect woman?  Imagine Taylor Swift, Anne Hathaway, Scarlett Johannson all combined"

The perfect woman.  I guess I don't even have to say why I found this interesting.

World Net Daily:  "San Francisco drug addicts unionize"

I guess even drug addicts in San Francisco are smarter than workers in the South.

George W. Bush: Keystone XL Is A ‘No-Brainer’

Well, I guess you would know a no-brainer when you see one, George.

Bob Owens:  "BOMBSHELL: Sandra Fluke an Obama-affiliated Marxist ringer "

No comment needed.

And finally, a Blast from the Past, from one of our former favorites here at Green Eagle, who seems to have descended into intellectual obscurity for some unknown reason:

Reverend J. Grant Swank, 2008:  "If in the Oval Office, he will see to it that biblical Christianity is erased completely. There will not be one sign of the Judeo-Christian heritage left once B. Hussein is in the White House."

Boy, were you right on target there, J. Grant- one short term later, and there is no sign of Christianity left in the country, all due to the unceasing Mooslum attacks of B. Hussein Obama.  Why, oh WHY, didn't we listen to you when we had the chance?


Poll P. said...

Nice collection.

Cardinal44 said...

Do you even need "conspiracy" facts to convict in an actual court of law Cheney, Bush (1 and 2), Rumsfeld and the great god Reagan as traitors? I think not.

Green Eagle said...

I agree, Cardinal.