Sunday, March 17, 2013

Wingnut Wrapup

Let's start things off with a video that the tea party people made to show (over and over again, apparently) to their fellow Conservatives at the CPAC conference this week:

Isn't that delightful?  What a brilliant portrayal of those evil liberals and what they want for America.  Well, now, on with the rest:

John Ransome, Town Hall:  "Thank God for the Koch Brothers"

Because who could be behind their attempt to destroy our democracy but God?  Answer me that one smart ass.  Yeah, what kind of Commie would think that God wasn't all in favor of a country ruled by a couple of fascist billionaires?  And yes, this dick said that with a straight face, and apparently really means it.  Scary, huh?

Guy Benson, Town Hall:  "Revealed: How Paul Ryan Reduces Deficits by $4.6 Trillion and Balances the Budget"

With this girl's help:

Otherwise, nothing but the same old Republican lies.  Surprised?

Dennis Prager, Town Hall:  "Marijuana: Another Gift of the Left to America's Youth"

Actually, Dennis, Marijuana was a gift of God to America's youth.  The left just showed their appreciation for his bounty.  Here's Dennis' position explained more fully:

"Yes, tobacco -- specifically cigarettes -- kills and marijuana doesn't. But, forgive the ultimate political incorrectness, young people would do much better in life if they smoked tobacco rather than weed."

Better dead than stoned.  Now, there's an interesting theory.  Let's see Dennis try to convince any sane people to go along with that one.

And another wonderful fantasy from the most intellectually dishonest talk show host of all time:

Prager University Video:   "Was Calvin Coolidge the Best President of the 20th Century?"

You've got to be kidding me.  I can't even begin to find the words to express my derision that anyone would even suggest such a thing.  Here's the argument Dennis presents to justify such a preposterous claim:

"When Coolidge left office, in 1929, the federal budget was lower than when he came in. Few other peacetimes presidents, not even Reagan, can boast this. In addition, the thirtieth president cut the top income tax rate to 25%, below Reagan’s storied 1986 rate of 28%."

The Federal budget was lower, and the tax rate on rich people was lower!  In 1929!  What an achievment!  Of course, eight months later, the entire economy collapsed and the Great
Depression started, but why quibble about minor things?  Rich people had their taxes cut!  And after all, isn't that the only thing on earth that means anything to Republicans?

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit:  "Another Obama Failure… 98% of Falkland Islanders Vote to Remain Under British Control"

And exactly how is this an Obama "failure?"  The Obama administration did refuse to take sides in this dispute, which, after all, has nothing to do with us.  Of course, Obama knew that the residents of the Falklands, who are almost entirely of British descent, would vote overwhelmingly to stay attached to Britain, so not taking sides was essentially support for Britain, but no, in the right wing fantasy world, Obama somehow stabbed Britain in the back by remaining neutral, instead of taking sides, at which point he would be attacked for doing that.

Bryan Fischer, Renew America:  "Homosexuals already have full marriage equality...The truth is simple, plain and unmistakable: homosexuals already have full marriage equality in all 50 states. Right now. As we speak. Nobody, absolutely, nobody is denying them the right to marry. Anywhere."

Hooray!  Another cultural problem solved!  And how is this true, according to Mr. Fischer?

"Homosexuals can get married everywhere just like everybody else – to one, adult, non-relative member of the opposite sex."

Oh.  Okay then.  I guess that takes care of everything.  And in further news, poor people are just as free as Mitt Romney to be really rich.  There- that solves our inequality problem, right?

Timothy Carney, Renew America:  "With Paul's filibuster, Tea Party made Senate work...Congress is a mostly broken institution, but last week showed what it takes to make it work: a bunch of Tea Partiers grinding things to a halt."

Making Congress Work:  Grinding it to a halt!  Sort of like destroying the village to save it.  A perfect example of Conservative government. 

Newsmax:  "Oliver North: Obama Admin. Has Abandoned War on Terror...Decorated military veteran and best-selling author Oliver North tells Newsmax that the decision to try Osama bin Laden’s son-in-law in civilian court shows that the administration has “abandoned” the war on terror."

Because not destroying our Constitutionally mandated judicial system is giving in to the terrorists.  That makes sense.  Ollie has this to say about Afghanistan:

"Obama refuses to use the word victory. We’re no longer talking about winning but basically handing over responsibility to the Afghans."

Ollie, sorry to break this to you, but anyone who talks about "winning" in Afghanistan is fucking crazy.  You don't get that, do you?

Breitbart:  "Rodman: I'm Going Back to North Korea"

This time, stay there, Dennis.  Really, just what we need dealing with North Korea- a mentally ill ex-basketball player.

Erick Erickson, Red State:  "Obamacare Will Not Crumble Without a Government Shutdown... But in case these Republicans missed it, just yesterday Speaker John Boehner said he would not risk the full faith and credit of the United States to defund Obamacare.  The continuing resolution must be the fight. The continuing resolution must be the vehicle by which Republicans draw a line in the sand. They must be willing to shut down the government until the Democrats consent to defunding Obamacare."

It's a legal program, enacted by a majority and approved by the right-leaning Supreme Court.  But in order to stop it, Republicans should be willing to violate the Constitution, destroy the economy and do permanent damage to the ability of the government to function.  These are the people who call themselves patriots.

Erick Erickson, Red State:  "That lefties are accusing the new pope of handing over lefties to the right wing junta for execution makes me adore the new pope. - I put that tweet up earlier today. Suddenly I’m being accused of supporting death squads."

Gee, I wonder why?

Jeannette Pryor, PJ Media:  "Along the Watchtower: Meditating on Bob Dylan and Pope Francis"

Something is happening here, but you don't get what it is, do you, Jeannette?

P. David Hornick, Snydertalk:  "Palestinians Plan to Protest ‘Dog’ Obama"

What, is Bo going on the trip too?  Oh, I get it- they called Obama a dog.  That's nicer than anything they have called him in five years.  I guess that's what Republicans are mad about- the Palestinians are too nice to him.

Randy Fardal, American Thinker:  "Kotlikoff versus Krugman: Economic Fallacies Exposed...Who reveals himself as more reliable: Boston University Economics Professor Laurence Kotlikoff, or the left's leading Keynesian propagandist?"

Randy has a real point there.  Really, a far more fair discussion would be between a Boston University economics professor and, say, a Nobel Prize winning Princeton economics professor.  Now, I wonder where we might find one of those, instead of "propagandist" Paul Krugman, who is obviously less reliable than someone we've never heard of.  Really, how dumb do they think people are?

John Hayward, Human Events:  "Feds recapture 4 immigrants released during Sequester Terror dump"

Terror dump.  Man, that's pathetic.  2,000 non-violent people released from custody due to the Republican game-playing with the budget- magically turned into an Obama administration plot to unleash 2,000 terrorists on the country. 

Bridget Johnson, PJ Media:  "Palin to CPAC: Get Rid of Political Consultants and Run for Office"

And then either lose or quit halfway through your term.

Clarice Feldman, American Thinker:  "The Mekong River: Calling into Question the Germ Theory of Disease...We are assured that for cooking and drinking they have potable water but no water pipes were evident from our vantage point. All we saw was the periodic lowering of buckets which were lifted upward into the houses.  This calls into serious question the germ theory of disease."

Really? Clarice sees some people apparently drinking out of a polluted river without immediately dropping dead, and that proves that two hundred years of medicine are nonsense, even though that science has saved literally billions of lives.  Well, I'll tell you what, Clarice- how about we innoculate you with the Ebola virus, and see whether "germs" cause disease.  There is just no bottom to the depths that right wingers will stoop to try to undermine public faith in actual knowledge, since it always contradicts what they want the suckers to believe.  Now, "germs" don't cause disease.  Who does cause disease, Clarice, Jews?

Dan Spencer, Town Hall:  "Sen. Ted Cruz’ CPAC 2013 keynote speech: Conservatives are winning...Senator Cruz cited Rand Paul’s recent filibuster, sequestration implementation, and Cruz’ amendment to repeal funding for ObamaCare — unanimously supported Republican Senators of evidence of his premise."

You go with that, guys.  A meaningless publicity stunt, a deliberate Republican sabotage of the government and a time-wasting amendment that has exactly zero chances of accomplishing anything.  Yeah, you are winning.  Keep telling yourselves that.  Winning the Biggest Congressional Jackass contest is so much more important than winning, let's say, elections.  Right on, Conservatives.

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit:  "Oh, Good Grief… Obama flies a 747 to Chicago to Tout His Fuel-Saving Plan...You just can’t make this stuff up."

That would be Air Force One.  You just can't make up the fact that Obama went somewhere on Air Force One.  How did you expect him to get there, Jim, hitchhike?  Or are you just still denying that he is actually the President?


LeRoy Matthews said...

Study my Letter on
The so-called "federal government" is not only Bunkrupt,& Head-Over- Heels In Debt, It's Operating Way in The Red,& Has a Huge, & Increasing, Budget Deficit. There's virtually zero $ for anything whatsoever.
(To find my Letter, try searching for Crazy Inbox June 5,2012 p=6498.)

Green Eagle said...

LeRoy, I will read what you have to say, but I couldn't find it from the directions you left here. Can you please give me a better URL or search terms?

Green Eagle said...

Forget it, Leroy; I found what you were trying to send me to.

For general information, after a couple of years reporting on right wing delusions, I came to a decision some time ago that it was not acceptable to me to take pleasure in abusing people who were obviously mentally ill. Consequently, I will not reply in any detail to LeRoy's comments, except to say to LeRoy that I hope you can find some relief for your condition. This is not a sarcastic remark; I am distressed to see someone like you in such a sad state, and really hope for the best for you.