Sunday, August 4, 2013

Wingnut Wrapup

Man, this gets annoying after a while.  Well, while we wait for Republicans to trot out their brand new rebranding- Libertarian Populism, which is all the buzz on the right these days, and which is intended to convince the rubes that it is actually the Democrats who are on the side of rich people- here's some more random idiocy from the right:

Jim "Dim Bulb" Hoft, Gateway Pundit:  "UNLIT CHOPPERS IN CHICAGO SKY"

And here's the picture Jim uses to illustrate this fact:


Jim, I hate to point this out to you, but your picture was taken during the day.  Maybe that's why the helicopters were unlit.  Idiot.

Jim continues:

"The new normal is to think Hollywood is filming the next big budget, high action, urban assault movie over your home."

It is, Jim?  Not where I come from.  We never see "Hollywood" filming the next urban assault movie over our houses.  Of course, maybe that's because we don't live where things like that happen.  We live in Hollywood.

Michael Barone, Town Hall:  "Michael Barone:  "Why are so many people so desperate to hold onto the idea that America is as racist as it has ever been?"

Because it is, jerk.  And every time you deny what is obvious to anyone, you just prove it a little more.

David Spady, Town Hall:  "All Aboard for the Obamacare Train Wreck"


Keep telling yourself that, sucker.  How do you think people in red States are going to feel when they have no health care, and they find out that people in blue States are getting health insurance for a couple hundred dollars a month, preexisting conditions covered?  So, whoop it up until January, when your idiotic followers will be yelling "keep your government hands off my Obamacare."

Cortney O'Brien, Town Hall:  "Awesome: Hundreds of Women Protest HHS Mandate In Front of White House"

Well, dozens anyway.  Bused in by the Catholic Church.  How impressive.

David Harsanyi, Town Hall:  "What Conservatives Can Learn From the Pope"


I'll tell you what Conservatives can learn from the Pope.  In fact, I'll tell you what they can learn from the last two Popes:  People really like nice people who care about human suffering and they really hate right wing jerks who only care about themselves and their money.  Of course, that's not what Conservatives will learn from the Pope.  Fat chance of that.  Here's what David took away from the Pope's recent conduct:

"The pope, it is widely reported, has "recast the Catholic Church's image" by focusing on its "inviting, merciful aspects"

Unfortunately, David seems to have forgotten that American Conservatism doesn't have any inviting, merciful aspects.  So, they're right back where they started from- acting like monsters and lying their asses off about it.

Daniel Horowitz, Red State:  "How do you take a state Romney carried by 23 points with 116 of 120 counties and turn it into a dead heat?"

Maybe by not having a billion dollars in corporate money to finance your propaganda.

Paula Bolyard, PJ Media:  "What Would Dietrich Bonhoeffer Say to Anthony Weiner?"


Who the fuck cares?

And now, the kind of madness that we can only get from Jim "Dim Bulb" Hoft, the dumbest man on the internet:  "BREAKING>>>  Obama WH Is Hiding Benghazi Survivors AND CHANGING THEIR NAMES"

Right.  He is hiding the Benghazi survivors, maybe in FEMA concentration camps.  And when did this happen?

"This came after Jake Tapper at CNN broke the news that there were “dozens” of CIA operatives on the ground in Benghazi on 9-11 when the consulate came under attack and the agency is."

Well, shut my mouth!  The CIA is  "going to great lengths to make sure whatever it was doing, remains a secret."  And that never happened before- the CIA usually puts everything it does on national TV.  How dare the CIA keep what it's doing a secret?  That treacherous Obama must be behind it; who else could be so evil?

Sher Zieve, Renew America:  "Living under tyranny and the solidification of the Obama dictatorship--Part I"

Oh God, Sher, give it up already and go home.

Betsey McCaughey, Renew America:  "Defunding: the Framers’ remedy for presidential lawlessness"


One the framers never used, or at least Betsey couldn't find a single example of it.  But since when did we expect the truth from the likes of Betsey?

Washington Times:  "Sarah Palin: McCain campaign 'elitists' banned me from telling the truth"


I don't know why they bothered.  Sarah Palin isn't capable of telling the truth.

Heather Ginsburg, Town Hall:  "Louisiana Looks to Reinvent High School with Help from the Private Sector"

Reinvent.  Heh.  That's like saying, "U.S. looks to reinvent World Trade Center with help from Al Qaida."

James Lewis, American Thinker:  "Obama is trapped in Syria...Obama meddling has endangered the 30-year peace in the Middle East."

30-year peace in the Middle East...Except for Lebanon, Egypt, Tunisia, Sudan, Libya, Yemen, Pakistan, and oh yeah, Iraq and Afghanistan.  And a couple more that I'm sure I missed.  What kind of fantasy world do these people live in?

Rick Moran, American Thinker:  "House votes to block IRS enforcement of Obamacare...GOP sticks it to the IRS"

In the Republican world where the House controls everything and the President and the Senate don't exist.  This is (I think- who can really tell?) their 40th vote to stop Obamacare.  And this one will "stick it" to the bill just like the other 39.  So, knock yourselves out, guys.  I'm sure you can reach 60 by Christmas if you really try.

Lloyd Marcus, Daily Caller:  "Will the real black America please stand up?"

No, Lloyd, because if they do, one of your right wing white buddies will shoot them.

And now, the wingnut Projection of the day:

John Ransom, Town Hall:  "Why do liberals think that the patina of moral superiority entitles them to act inferior in every other way? "

God in heaven above, look in the mirror once in a while, guy.

Doug Giles, Town Hall:  "ATTENTION AL SHARPTON: Black Dude in White Hoodie Viciously Stabs White Teenage Girl"

OH MY GOD!  A black guy committed a CRIME!!!!  It's open season on those sons of bitches now, right?

Funny thing, this girl was named Natasha Martinez.  In the wingnut world, a guy named Zimmerman is a Hispanic, but someone named Martinez is white. 

Taylor Colwell, Town Hall:  "Unbelievable: Charlie Rangel Calls Tea Partiers "White Crackers"


To Republicans, it's always unbelievable when someone tells the truth.

P. David Hornick, PJ Media:  "How I Became a Conservative"

If this story doesn't involve someone shooting a nail gun into your skull, I don't believe a word of it.

Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit:  "Whoa!… Wildly Popular Anti-Obama Belly Dance Video Takes Egypt By Storm"

Wow! Jim says it has 160,000 hits!  That's just so amazing!  Almost as amazing as this:



Now, there's a real example of what the internet was invented to do.

Star Parker, World Net Daily:  "Republicans, how 'bout some moral leadership?"

Don't make me laugh.

Michael Bargo Jr, American Thinker:  "How Democrats use Federal Agencies to Influence Politics"

Let me try to explain how this works:  Federal agencies enforce laws like the Civil Rights act, the Social Security act, and Medicare, which were passed by Democrats.  Then, people's lives get better.  So, next time around they vote for Democrats.  What a treasonous conspiracy!

2 comments:

Magpie said...

"The new normal is to think Hollywood is filming the next big budget, high action, urban assault movie over your home."

That sounds like possums fighting on the roof.
Jim Hoft has probably never had possums fighting on his roof.
They'd run away from the overpowering smell of dipshit.

Dervish Sanders said...

Funny video. Maybe those helicopters were the cops looking for meth labs. Happens all the time where I live.