Matt Vespa, Town Hall: "Oh, Here We Go: Hillary Taking Credit For Democratic Wins Last Night"
Town Hall's lead story about the Democratic blowout- if they couldn't use it somehow to smear Hillary, they would have ignored it altogether.
Streiff, Red State: "The Surprising Key To The Democrats’s Win In Virginia"
Red State's only coverage of the election. The surprise? When more Democrats vote, they win. Man, it took a genius to figure that one out. However, it proves to Streiff that, somehow, this election didn't mean a thing. Streiff is hardly the only person lying to himself this way; it would be boring to repeat it over and over again, but this is a common delusion on the right today, to explain why yesterday's election had zero to do with how people feel about Trump and the Republican party.
J. Christian Adams, PJ Media: "Gillespie Ran a JEB! Campaign in a Trump World"
Even though Gillespie ran one of the filthiest, most smear-laden campaigns in history, it just wasn't filthy enough to satisfy Trump voters. Man, I bet he never makes that mistake again.
Cristina Laila, Gateway Pundit: "EPIC! President Trump Trolls Hillary and Congratulates “Deplorables” on Election Anniversary"
Gatway Pundit's way of reporting on the Republican electoral loss? Just ignore it in favor of telling some more fairy tales about Trump's victory a year ago. And don't think they are alone in taking this tack:
Charlie Sperling and Amanda House, Breitbart: "November 8, 2016: The Untold Story of Breitbart’s Election Night"
Man, we had a great day a year ago. Time to crow about that.
Jim's line on the election? Gillespie, who stuck like glue to Trump, and whom Trump totally supported until he lost, just wasn't close enough to Trump, because everyone in the country loves Trump, so you can never lose by kissing his ass. And here's a little more from Gateway Pundit to push that line:
Joshua Caplan, Gateway Pundit: "POTUS Trump Rips GOP Elite Gillespie After Loss: “Gillespie Worked Hard But Did Not Embrace Me or What I Stand For”
LOSER!!!! Trump hates a loser, even though he loved him some Ed Gillespie when he thought he was going to win.
And now on to the rest of the "news"
David P. Goldman, PJ Media: "Liberal Jews aren't funny."
Whatever, David. I guess we aren't allowed to call you an anti-Semitic son of a bitch because you claim to have a Jewish last name, huh?
World Net Daily: "Mohammad gets prison in plot to kill federal judge"
Hmm. By Green Eagle's calculations, Mohammed died 1,385 years ago. Probably screws up his chance of getting parole, I'd guess
Daniel John Sobieski, American Thinker: "Does Donna Brazile Know Who Killed Seth Rich?"
Well, since the universal conclusion of law enforcement is that he committed suicide, I'd guess that Donna Brazile does know who killed him. I don't think that was what Daniel was getting at, however. Daniel apparently is convinced that Hillary murdered him, maybe in between raping children in a pizza parlor.
Shawn Mitchell, Town Hall: "Media is Dirtier Than it Accuses Trump of Being"
An oldie but a goodie. Of course, the media are not the President. This dirtiness mainly revolves around daring to report on his treason, which is way out of line, while refusing to devote their time to the latest Republican lies about Hillary. I bet that surprises you.
Justin Haskins, Town Hall: "We Don’t Need Gun Control to Stop Mass Shootings"
No, we need more guns. Their answer will never be any different. And don't bother them with facts; they have a whole encyclopedia of "facts" of their own.
Matt Vespa, Town Hall: "How Did The Texas Shooter Pass A Background Check After A Domestic Violence Conviction?"
Good question, Matt. Too bad Matt doesn't have a clue of what the answer might be, but he sure as hell is convinced that, whatever that answer is, it had better not result in stopping the sale of one single gun in this country.
Beth Baumann, Town Hall: "Report: Sen. Rand Paul Assaulted In His Kentucky Home"
Beaten up by his next door neighbor, who is a well known anesthesiologist; a rare example of doctor on doctor crime. Why, who knows? Of course this story was only hours old before hundreds of right wing loons blamed the attack on a left wing terrorist.
(note: this only counts as doctor on doctor crime, if you accept that Rand Paul's medical license, which was granted by a private body created by Rand Paul himself, is worth a nickel. Personally, I'd get my glasses from a witch doctor before I went to Rand Paul. At least I wouldn't get any lectures about Ayn Rand from the witch doctor.)
Cortney O'Brien, Town Hall: "'Slightly Clumsy,' But Not Sinister: Rick Perry's Fossil Fuel Remarks"
Rick Perry: too stupid to be sinister. I might buy that, only Louie Gohmert and Michelle Bachmann proved long ago that there is no such thing as too stupid to be evil.
Linda Goutsmith, Renew America: "humanitarian hoax of George Goros: Killing America with kindness"
I think Linda might have meant George Soros there. Maybe not, who knows? Of course, to right wingers like Linda, a rich man actually trying to help other people is so inconceivable that it must be a hoax.
Kurt Schlichter, Town Hall: "Mueller Strikes Out; Democrat Nuts And Never Trumpers Hardest Hit...Note: This is satire...obert Mueller, the fatally conflicted Special Counsel in charge of the Russian collusion snipe hunt, just came out with his indictments, and there has been a lot of confusion among the lunatics, weirdos, and 23-year-old internet pundits who make up his fan base. They’ve been leveraging their extensive federal court experience, which consists of having heard that federal courts are a thing, into remarkably silly insights about the charges against Mrrs. Manafort, Gates, and Puffleupagus (sic) and how they relate to Donald Trump."
Did that sound like satire to you? Or did it sound like the bitter, hateful ravings of a vicious partisan who knows that the President he has tied himself to is about to be revealed to be a traitor?
And some incisive political analysis:
Derek Hunter, Town Hall: "The Left Is Just Full Of Miserable People"
Of course, this is about Harvey Weinstein, or, as Derek calls it, "The liberal sexual harrassment scandal." No word about Trump and "the conservative sexual harrassment scandal," but then, nothing surprising about that, I guess. Conservatives are proud of pawing women.
"Judge" Andrew Napolitano, Town Hall: "The Tip of a Prosecutorial Iceberg? The danger of such a deal is that Manafort and Gates may offer to tell Mueller what they think he wants to hear -- even if it is not truthful -- so that they can have their prison exposure lessened."
See, here the wingnuts are, preparing themselves to believe that anything bad about Trump is a self-serving lie. They will never accept reality because it reflects so badly on their own judgment and common decency. And might interfere with their ability to serve their masters.
Cristina Laila, Gateway Pundit: "HANNITY WARNS: Big News on Obama Thursday “TICK TOCK"
So far...nothing. Surprised? Here's what they are deluding themseves about:
Knock yourselves out, guys. We all know which modern President is likely going to prison.
Jim Hoft, Gateway Pundit: "We Were Right! Social Media and MSM Despised Trump and Gateway Pundit – Buried Our Tweets and We Still Kicked Ass"
If they didn't despise Trump they would be idiots. And the only ass that Jim Hoft regularly kicks is his own.
Alan Keyes, World Net Daily: "A year after victory: Jury's still out on Trump"
Ha. Talk about self-delusion. Or more likely, just a paid liar. Boy, is this piece packed with lies, as you would expect from Alan. Unfortunately, they are all really boring lies, so I will just move on.
Donald Trump, the Larry O'Connor Show: "because I'm the president of the United States... I'm not supposed to be doing the kind of things I would love to be doing."
Like pouring about four trillion dollars from the Federal government into your private bank account.
"it’s very discouraging to me I'll be honest"
I bet it is, buddy.
And I'm very frustrated by it."
So quit already.
Earick Ward, American Thinker: "Liberals' reaction to the Texas church shooting is not about gun control...This is something more sinister. By getting out in front of the narrative, and the facts, leftists are attempting to secure the moral high ground."
Yup, that's right, Earick (by the way, what the fuck kind of name is Earick?) Liberals are attempting to secure the moral high ground by caring more about people's lives than gun company profits. Hateful, I tell you!
Jack Hellner, American Thinker: "The Democrats' sudden concern for the middle class...Does anyone truly believe that the Dems actually care about the middle class?"
What, the party that brought you the weekend, the 40 hour week, the minimum wage, social security, medicare, collective bargaining, the GI bill, consumer safety regulations, food and workplace safety laws, universal public education and who knows what all else? That party? No, they hate the middle class. It's the party that has always been against every one of these things that really cares about the middle class.
All I can say is, how can people be so stupid?
Before It's News: "Bombshell: Hillary Clinton ‘Pedophile Sex Tape’ About to Be Released"
No bottom to their degradation. I don't care that Hillary is a public figure; how can this be allowed? Of course, when you click on this story, it leads to a video, because people who believe things like this are too stupid to read.
Owen Shroyer, Infowars: "Hitler still alive"
At 128. Speaks worlds for that vegetarian diet. Oh well, I guess it had to come to this. Don't forget, we are dealing here with a source that hundreds of thousands of people follow and believe, every single day.