Saturday, September 5, 2015

Wingnut Wrapup

Let's just clear the backlog, to get ready for the even crazier stuff that is bound to be just around the corner.

First a shoutout to the most idiotic Conservative delusion of the last couple of weeks; a category in which there is always intense competition:

Oh well, let's just get on to the rest:

Katie Pavlich, Town Hall:  "Carly Fiorina Responds to Hillary's Comparison of Republicans to Terrorists"

Oh, that's exciting.  Can't wait to hear more about that.  Just not right now, thanks.

S. E. Cupp, Town Hall:  "Blame Liberals for the Rise of Trump...I have a different explanation for ascendant Trumpism. It isn't the result of conservatism but of liberalism."

Well, of course it's liberals' fault when the entire Republican party apparatus runs off the rails.  Everything is.  My only surprise is that she didn't blame Obama personally.

Matt Vespa:  “Hillary compares Republicans to terrorists...If A Republican Did This, The World Would Come To A Halt”

Matt, you lying son of a bitch, Republicans have been comparing Democrats to terrorists every single day for decades now, and the world hasn't even slowed down a tiny little bit.  Try dealing with reality for a change.

Tyler O'Neil, PJ Media:  "Thanks, Obama: How a Divisive Presidency Invigorated the GOP"

If by "invigorated," you mean "drove them batshit crazy, by failing to do anything they could impeach him for" well, okay.

And life on some other planet:

Derek Hunter, Town Hall: "The Clintons Continue To Clinton...What a mess. Every week, seemingly every other day, there is a new shady revelation about Bill and Hillary Clinton that manages to top the last one. For them there seems to be no bottom; for their supporters, there seems to be no self-respect."

A new pseudo-scandal every week, from now to election day, propelled by lies and smears.  That's sort of the Republican plan, isn't it?  It's the only hope they have.

Leah Barkoukis, Town Hall:  "Democratic Presidential Candidate: Of Course We Want Immigrants to Vote Democratic"

It is an abomination when Democrats want people to vote for them.  A real, manly party wins by preventing people from voting.

Cortney O'Brien, Town Hall:  "Rick Perry Gets Emotional Talking About Our Troops and Obama’s Foreign Policy Failures"

Oh, that must have been special.  So sorry I missed it.

Rick Moran, PJ Meida:  "Jindal: Hillary ‘Literally One Email Away From Going to Jail’

This is a big story on the right these days.  And Jindal is right- as soon as they find an e-mail from Hillary plotting with ISIS to blow up the White House, or admitting to several hundred counts of child rape, or something, off she goes to jail.  Of course, she's already released about 30,000 e-mails without revealing a thing that is improper, but that next one...man, I can hardly wait!

Debra Heine, PJ Media:  "FBI Investigating Hillary Clinton for Possible Violation of the Espionage Act"

Oh God, she's done for now!  Debra explains:

"...but according to a Fox News report Friday afternoon...A separate source, who also was not authorized to speak on the record, said the FBI will further determine whether Clinton should have known, based on the quality and detail of the material, that emails passing through her server contained classified information regardless of the markings."

I see.  An anonymous source, reported on Fox News, claims that, although Hillary's e-mails contained not one shred of classified information, she is still guilty, because she should have telepathically known that a couple of them would be classified years later.  A novel legal theory.  And when do we get around to thinking about the twenty million e-mails that Bush and Cheney deleted while in office?  Oh, never.  I see.

Barbara J. Stock, Renew America:  "Obama does nothing to stop ISIS"

Other than bombing the hell out of them, of course.  As Barbara says,

"Islam takes full advantage of the stupid but loyal Muslims."

Hey, another way that ISIS is just like the Republican party.

Bill Hoffman, Newsmax:  "Cleta Mitchell Rips 'Congenital Liar' Hillary 'Pig-Pen' Clinton"

What I want to know is, who the hell is Cleta Mitchell?  Other than being a subhuman scum who will write the most vile thing she can think of, if some right wing billionaire will pay her. I mean, they refer to her as if she were Mahatma Gandhi.  Oh well, best not to get too upset- it's still fifteen months from the election.  Things are only going to get worse.

And now, your Christian moral lesson of the day:

Jeannie DeAngelis, American Thinker:  "We're All Like Josh Duggar"

Of course we are!  We've all sexually molested young children, haven't we?

"At the time I felt that the sex-obsessed left was demonizing Josh for participating in behavior that, had it been anyone else, they would make light of."

Why, if there is anything the left makes light of, it's sexual predators.  Everybody knows that.

"Moreover, from the tenor of the accusations it just seemed like antipathy for Christian conviction was at the root of the left looking for an excuse to humiliate the entire Duggar family, embarrass his sisters, and paint Josh’s parents as ultra-conservative fundamentalist criminals."

Right on, Jeannie.  Because that is what they are,  ultra-conservative fundamentalist criminals, whether you like it or not.  In my now relatively long life, it's amazing to me how many ultra-conservative fundamentalists have turned out to be criminals.

"And the truth is that although Josh Duggar should apologize to those who protected him, in God’s eyes what he’s done is no different than the immoral things the rest of us do."

You mean like forgetting to take my dogs for a walk, or taking a long lunch hour at work?  I guess that is the same as raping your sister, in God's eyes.  At least in the eyes of Jeannie's God, and apparently the Duggars' too.

A little piece of advice from old G.E:  Don't want your sick, criminal perversions spread around the whole country?  Then don't put yourselves on national TV as perfect Christians.  Of course, then, if you get caught, you are pretty likely to end up in prison, instead of in a "rehab program" run by a friend of the family, but hey, having Christians like Mike Huckabee and Ted Cruz on your side has to count for something.

Selwyn Duke, American Thinker:  "Guns don't kill people.  Liberalism does."

Okay there, whatever, Selwyn.  I guess that's a theory.

Ron Paul:  "Blame the Fed for Stock Market Crash"

In China.  The stock market crash that started in China.  It's all the Fed's fault.  Thanks, Obama.

Kurt Schlichter, Town Hall:  "Anti-Gun Rights Fascists Fail Again"

It is apparently fascist if you don't want to be shot.

Matt Barbour, Town Hall:  "Why the Supreme Court is not Supreme"

This article should really have been called "When the Supreme Court is not Supreme."  Turns out that Supreme Court rulings mean nothing when they disagree with Matt Barbour.  Also, an added extra in this article is the revelation that the Constitution means whatever Matt Barbour says it does, not what the Supreme Court says.  Well, now we know.

And now, projection, what?

Leon Wolf, Red State:  "But the more germane fact about the sorry crop of Democrats on offer  is that they have been fantastically bad at actually accomplishing anything."

Except ending a Republican depression, having years of job growth, cutting the deficit by two thirds, making health care affordable for twenty million people, reaching a diplomatic deal with one of our biggest enemies, seeing a great deal of progress in ending discrimination against one of our largest minorities, not starting and losing any three trillion dollar wars, getting Osama Bin Laden...

Meanwhile, the Republicans have accomplished sixty votes to end Obamacare, which they can't do, and are now on the verge of their second government shutdown.  That's a record to be proud of.

Bryan Fischer, Renew America:  "Dating: Whom do you date?"

None of your business, jerk.  At least it's not a $1500 a night porn actress that I met on a cheating website.

Breitbart:  "CHENEY: WE COULD SEE ANOTHER 9/11 WITH MUCH DEADLIER WEAPONS"

Put you back in charge, Dick, and we sure could.

Michelle Malkin, Town Hall:  "Eric Cantor: Poster Boy of the Beltway GOP Crapweasels"

They hate him!  He's a crapweasel!  Let's just get this straight- Eric Cantor is a standard-issue Republican just like every other one of them out there.  He was defeated for one reason only- he is Jewish, and so the right wing Christians in his State turned on him.  Don't even pretend anything else happened here.

Bob Barr, Town Hall:  "Bob Barr: Koch Brothers Leading The Charge Against Crony Capitalism"

Sometimes you just have to laugh.  Can anyone possibly believe this swill?  I remember back in the nineties, when Bob Barr was as crazy as any of them.  Now, he's been left so far behind that hardly anyone remembers who he is any more.

Terry Jeffrey, Town Hall:  "Can a Christian Be a County Clerk in America?  This is a question it now appears may ultimately be decided by five Supreme Court justices. With it, too, will ride such questions as: Can a Christian be a doctor? A nurse? A public-school teacher?"

Well, how about this question:  Is there a "Christian" in America that isn't a lying jackass?

And now, a sample of piggishness that will only grow greater:

Erick Erickson, Red State:  “She is trying to run a campaign as her own woman when she originally got elected by being Bill Clinton’s kept woman.”

"Kept woman" apparently having suddenly morphed into a synonym for "wife," at least when it's the wife of a Democrat.  So now it's okay to groundlessly call Hillary a whore.  And cue the screaming victimhood if she objects to this.

Rick Moran, PJ Media:  :Gwen Ifill Celebrates Clinching of Iran Deal...You stay classy, Gwen."

Apparently, it is now an abomination to take any satisfaction in a move toward peace.

More to come, all too soon.  See you.

3 comments:

ez said...

Cleta, is that the female form of the name Cletus?

Zog said...

"Let's just get this straight- Eric Cantor is a standard-issue Republican just like every other one of them out there. He was defeated for one reason only- he is Jewish, and so the right wing Christians in his State turned on him. Don't even pretend anything else happened here."

I'll disagree. There is a split within the GOP on immigration, with people falling in one of two camps:

GOP Camp 1) We must increase immigration, because it will decrease wages and thus improve profits for the plutocrats.

GOP Camp 2) We must crack down on immigration, because we have too many non-whites polluting our country already.

Cantor was in Camp 1, and Brat in Camp 2. There are more Republican voters in Camp 2, mainly because there are many more hard-core racists in the United States than there are billionaires.

It's not always about religion.

Anonymous said...

Glad to see your are still using your spare time wisely