Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Wingnut Wrapup- The Flood Continues

Whoo, back already.  They seem to need to be really shouting out their idiocies today.  I wonder why they're so active?

Ben Shapiro, Town Hall:  "What If There's No Trump-Putin Conspiracy?"

Yeah, and while we are on the subject, what if the moon doesn't exist?  What if Smurfs are real?  What if monkeys really can play the electric guitar?  Ben explains himself:

"Trump issued a series of tweets implying that he created a relationship of trust with Russian President Vladimir Putin... this looks rather suspicious, unless it turns out that pretty much every Trumpian scandal can be explained through a combination of Trump's ego and the incompetence of those around him."

See, even if he does go out on fifth avenue and start shooting people, he isn't guilty because he's just an incompetent egomaniac.  That explains everything, and makes it okay.  See, Trump could open our borders to an invading Russian horde and it would all be fine, because he's just incompetent.  Absolutely what we need in the White House.  Well, that's their story, and they are sticking to it.

So, time for the stupid right wing cartoon of the day:



What is that even supposed to mean?  That it is unacceptable for Democrats to look at the actions of the Trump administration?  That Donald Trump Jr. is just doing "opposition research" when he collaborates with the Russians to undercut the security of our elections?  That treason and reporting the truth are the same thing, as long as it's Republicans committing the treason?  Oh well, I guess we'll never know.

John Stossel, Town Hall:  "Stupid Hostile Media"

Well, just spit it right out there, John.  John continues:

"New York Times writers are so upset by Trump's rants against them that they act like he's a Venezuelan dictator who will shut them down. (Wait, don't Times socialists like Venezuelan dictators?)"

No, New York Times writers are upset by Trump acting like a Venezuelan dictator, or to be more accurate, a Russian dictator, something which is just fine with people like John, i.e. Republicans. And let's not move on before noticing John slipping in the preposterous lie that the people at the Times are socialists who love left wing dictators.

Brent Bozell, Town Hall:  "Remember Bill Clinton's Asiagate Scandal?"

No.

Jonah Goldberg, Town Hall:  "Charlie Gard's Fate Shouldn't Be Decided By the State"

Charlie Gard is the British baby that is so badly brain damaged that the English government does not want to pay millions to keep him alive for a few more months.  Notice that Jonah, like all right wingers, does not give a damn about the thousands of children who are going to die every year because our State, in the form of the Republican Congress, is deciding that they are just too expensive to keep alive, at least if rich people are going to get their tax cuts.

Bob Barr, Town Hall:  "Welcome to the Post-Factual World"

No welcome needed for readers of Wingnut Wrapup.  We've been visiting for years.

Brad Slager, Red State:  "Black Lives Matter Opposes Planet of the Apes"

Hang in there, Brad- you've got a real winner of an issue this time.

Loren Heal, Red State:  "Donald Trump Jr Met With The Russians And Oops I Just Yawned"

Nothing to see here, folks.  Just move on:

"It’s not that I don’t care about foreign influence on our elections. I do. It’s that I don’t believe there was any substantive effect on our election by Russia."

And I'm not going to believe it, either, no matter what happens, because I get paid not to believe it.

"Suppose, for the sake of argument, that the worst imaginings of anti-Trump Democrats and their Russia Narrative are all true:

Suppose that President Trump is a Russian spy...Suppose that the Russians hacked the election...What all of that would mean, collectively, is that Democrats, with the news organizations of the Associated Press, ABC, CBS, NBC, MSNBC, CNN, and even ESPN carrying their water were bested by a foreign propaganda mill feeding stories to Facebook."

See, even if Trump committed the worst act of treason in the history of the United States, it would still be the fault of the Democrats and the news media.  Glad we got that straightened out.

Jim Jamitis, Red State:  "Am I The Only One Who Is Losing Faith In…Well…Everything?"

Everything, of course, except the allegation that the Republican party has nothing but the good of the nation at heart, and that the Democrats are vicious traitors.  No, Jim still believes that. It's always so inspiring to see someone sticking by their values.

"I’m inspired by Andrew Breitbart’s  book Righteous Indignation where he calls for tearing down the “Democrat-Media Complex.”

Oh, and he still has faith in Breitbart.  Glad to hear that.

Bridget Johnson, PJ Media:  "Ryan on Don Jr.'s Russia Meeting: Let Mueller Do His Job"

Translation into English:  We Congressional Republicans are just going to ignore the whole thing while we try to pass tax cuts for rich people.  If Muller comes up with anything, Trump can just fire him, and that will be that.

Debra Heine, Red State:  "Don Jr.'s Emails Show Poor Judgment — Not Evidence of Treason"

And hey, since when is a Republican disqualified from his office because of poor judgment?

Rick Moran, PJ Media:  "Donald Trump, Jr. Is the Dumbest Traitor in World History -- Or Not"

Hold your judgment on that one, Rick.  There's still a long time to go in this scandal.  Rick's explanation:

"Is he really that stupid? And are the Russians really so cruel that they would have approached one of the nominee's chief campaign advisers directly, with no buffer, no cutout, not even a scapegoat to protect such an important asset? What kind of a black op were the Russians running here?  None of this tracks."

Is a guy named Trump really stupid?  Are Russians really cruel?  Hey, who could believe that?  Now, time to get back to Hillary's e-mails, don't you think?

Charlie Martin, PJ Media:  "Where Do Japanese Babies Come From?"

Don't worry about that, Charlie.  We'll explain it to you when you are old enough.

Joshua Caplan, Gateway Pundit:  "Sign From Jesus? Technical Malfunction Occurs As Reporter Asks Pelosi If She’s ‘Holy’ 

Sign from Jesus?  Man, it sounds like Jesus is watching as much TV as Trump, if he caught that one.

John Solomon, The Hill:  "Comey’s private memos on Trump conversations contained classified material"

Catch that part about "private memos?"  Now, apparently, it is against the law for the head of the FBI to write down what happened at a meeting he attended, even if he kept it private.  I guess the head of the FBI does not have a security clearance, so even telling himself something is a crime.

Elizabeth Nahas, American Thinker:  "As much as I am grateful for my evolution toward truth, the Left’s sound bites have increased exponentially. Consequently, many of us on the Right remain in the underground for fear of retribution. With a Republican President and Congress, why does this continue? The answer is simple: The Right’s image and messaging continues to be abysmal..."

Elizabeth, you forgot to note that the right's image is abysmal because the right is made up entirely of abysmal people.  Try stopping being disgusting human beings, and in a while, your image will improve, I promise you.  Give it a try and get back to me in a decade or two.

Jack Hellner, American Thinker:  "What counts as treason differs depending on the letter after your name"

You've got that right, Jack.  If you are a Republican, selling your country to a foreign dictator is not treason, while if you are a Democrat, well, treason consists in anything you do, really.  That's pretty much Jack's point, so we'll leave it at that.

Chuck Ross, Daily Caller:  "Maine Democratic Rep Makes Physical Threat Against 'Pu**y' Trump"

Huh?  Purry Trump?  Putty Trump?  I don't get it.  Oh well, no sense thinking about this too much.

Eric Owens, Daily Caller:  "Struggling College Splurges On $306 MILLION DORM"

I wonder if this story is because the "struggling college" is identified in the first sentence of this story as historically black?  How dare THEY spend money on a dorm?

"For perspective, the $306 million cost of the dorm is a few million more than the entire annual gross-domestic product of the island nation of Palau."

Whoo, that really is a lot!  Here is the picture that was run with this story:

Although the fact is never mentioned in the story, this is obviously not a new dormitory, but a palace somewhere in Europe.  The actual cost of the dorm, as reported by the college, is $7 million, in case you are so old fashioned as to care about the truth.  But I mean, if police are allowed to kill black people whenever they feel like it, why shouldn't Republicans be allowed to lie about them whenever they want?

Amber Athey, Daily Caller:  "Sen. Kennedy Has Wildly Unrealistic Expectations For The New FBI Director"

He wants him to be honest, and serious about pursuing crime.  I'll give Amber this: with Republicans in charge of confirming him, that is wildly unrealistic.

David Hookstead, Daily Caller:  "Here Is Video Proof Kim Kardashian Is An Idiot"

Well, glad you guys are breaking new ground in serious investigative journalism.

Amber Athey, Daily Caller:  "Trump Jr. Admits He 'Would Have Done Things A Little Differently' With Russian Lawyer Meeting"

Yeah, if he had known that he was going to get caught.

Michael Bastach, Daily Caller:  "Delaware-Sized Iceberg Breaks Free From Antarctica, But Don't Blame Global Warming"

No, don't do that!  Blame Obama.

Rich Lowry, Newsmax:  "China Not Poised to Assume Global Leadership"

Well, too bad, Rich, because your guy Trump is handing it to them on a golden platter.

Neil Urwitz, Newsmax:  "A Focused Trump Could Help His Press Secretaries Succeed"

You mean like if he focused on not sending them out to tell lies for him?  Don't hold your breath for that one, buddy.

And, God, enough, already.  Wingnuts have so much to shout down these days that I expect this garbage is going to be flowing like Niagara Falls for a while.

2 comments:

Infidel753 said...

They're getting into a panic. For all their floundering denial, they know the Veselnitskaya meeting and Donald Jr's e-mails are the smoking gun, the hard evidence of collusion that anyone can understand.

Are Russians really cruel? Hey, who could believe that?

The Russians also like to create situations they can use to blackmail people. Maneuvering a couple of dimwits from Trump's inner circle into positions where they would unknowingly be guilty of a serious crime, which Russia could later threaten to reveal if they got out of line, would just be icing on the cake for Putin.

Professor Chaos said...

Wouldn't the president being an incompetent egomaniac be a scandal itself?
Also, that comic is a good illustration of the fact that conservatives are never funny because their nokdz have no basis in reality