Monday, March 30, 2015

The Republican Suppression Act

A California ballot initiative to be voted on next year:

a) The abominable crime against nature known as Republicanism, called also Conservatism, is a monstrous evil that Almighty God, giver of freedom and liberty, commands us to suppress on pain of our utter destruction even as he overthrew Sodom and Gomorrha.

b) Seeing that it is better that offenders should die rather than that all of us should be killed by God's just wrath against us for the folly of tolerating-wickedness in our midst, the People of California wisely command, in the fear of God, that any person who willingly votes or campaigns for a Republican be put to death by bullets to the head or by any other convenient method.

c) No person shall distribute, perform, or transmit Republican propaganda directly or indirectly by any means to any person under the age of majority. Republican propaganda is defined as anything aimed at creating an interest in or an acceptance of human political deviance in support of rich psychopaths. Every offender shall be fined $1 million per occurrence, and/or imprisoned up to 10 years, and/or expelled from the boundaries of the state of California for up to life.

d) No person shall serve in any public office, nor serve in public employment, nor enjoy any public benefit, who is a Republican or who espouses Republican propaganda or who belongs to any group that does.

e) This law is effective immediately and shall not be rendered ineffective nor invalidated by any court, state or federal, until heard by a quorum of the Supreme Court of California consisting only of judges who are neither Republicans nor subject to disqualification hereunder.

f) The state has an affirmative duty to defend and enforce this law as written, and every member of the public has standing to seek its enforcement and obtain reimbursement for all costs and attorney's fees in so doing, and further, should the state persist in inaction over 1 year after due notice, the general public is empowered and deputized to execute all the provisions hereunder extra-judicially, immune from any charge and indemnified by the state against any and all liability.

g) This law shall be known as "The Republican Suppression Act" and be numbered as section 39 in Title 3 of the Penal Code, pertaining to offences against the sovereignty of the state. The text shall be prominently posted in every public school classroom. All laws in conflict with this law are to that extent invalid.



Don't get the joke?  Look here.

3 comments:

Jerry Critter said...

LOL!

Jean Valjean said...

Worth clicking on the link, people, or else you'd think Mr. EAGLE had a lurid and unsavory turn of mind.

Anonymous said...

I bet if you were seperate Mike Pence's hair,you would see a "666" embedded in his scalp