Congratulations, everybody. The stock market just closed, with the Dow Jones industrial average having fallen 2,997 points, setting another world record in Donald Trump's string of the largest point losses in history. What is more interesting to me is that this represents a percent loss of 12.93%, just managing to outpace the 12.82% that the market lost on October 29, 1929. I wonder when we are going to start seeing businessmen jumping out of skyscrapers again. I must add, just for fairness, that the greatest percentage loss in a single day, a colossal 22.61%, still belongs to that Republican Saint, Ronald Reagan, but of course, Reagan totally failed to put together a seemingly endless series of days like today, so I think we now can declare Donald Trump the world champion stock market destroyer, beating out the previous title holders, Reagan and Herbert Hoover. Just to be clear, this means that the market has lost just a shred under 30% of its value since February 12....